Fifty Neighs of Gray
by Pony Sound Guy
Summary: It is Twilight's day off at the Golden Oak Library, but when the screech of her book return sounds off and she discovers an erotic novel within, her day of R&R turns into a mess for her and her friends. As the book travels from pony to pony, it ends up on a path towards an individual that could be significantly impacted by its words, and not in a good way...
1. Twilight Sparkle

**Hi there, folks. So this is my first story I'll be posting on this account and I hear that first impressions are everything. With that being said, this is a story idea that I doubt you've read anywhere else, and I think that it's a great and entertaining concept that showcases my main writing style. I really hope you enjoy it and I would love it if you gave me some constructive criticism on anything you believe I could've done better.**

 **New chapters will be posted on Wednesday nights until the end of the story. (There are seven chapters I have written for it.) If you forget the posting time, I will have it at the top of my profile as well.**

 **A little bit of foreknowledge you should keep in mind while reading this story: this is around the end of the first/beginning of the second season of MLP:FiM. That means Twilight is just a unicorn and the Golden Oak Library is still intact. (Sorry if these are spoilers for some of you, but seriously, that was over three and two years ago, respectively.)**

 **With that being said, I'll shut up and let you read my first of hopefully many more stories to come.**

 **-PSG**

* * *

 _ **Fifty Neighs of Gray: Twilight Sparkle**_

As she woke up on her day off, Twilight stretched out her purple hooves and yawned, her mouth stretching as wide as it would allow to relieve herself of her sleepy feeling. Judging by how the light entered into her room from the window, it was already around ten o'clock, a few hours after when the librarian would normally be up. Glancing over the edge of her bed, she saw Spike still sound asleep in his basket, snoring as loud as usual. Twilight made sure to take care getting out of bed so she would not wake the young dragon, her assistant only stirring once as she traversed the squeaky wooden floor. The purple unicorn finally reached the stairs and made her way down them, taking in the view of her library. It was not very often that she would do so, considering she lived there and the Golden Oak Library was a common sight to her, but every once in awhile, when she thought about it, Twilight would take in a deep breath to smell the wood and books around her and view how beautiful the whole place really was. Everything was clean, things were tidy and put away, and all of the books were in their pla-

Twilight's thoughts were interrupted as squealing came from the direction of the front door, following with a clamorous thud, then ending with the same metallic cry as she had heard before.

The sound was all too familiar to her, but it did not register at first; the suddenness of it had thrown her off of her calm wake-up mode and sprung her into confusion. After she collected her thoughts, she began to walk over to the book return by the front of the library. She figured somepony must have decided to drop off their book, which she always appreciated, especially when they were on time.

Lifting the cover, she peered in and saw the outline of your average-sized book. A violet aura enveloped it and the hardcover began to rise out of the box. The sunlight from the window spread out over the cover of the book and revealed the title, the rest of it being a plain black. Twilight—having a vast knowledge of what books were in her library, how many copies she had of each, and where they all were—was confused by this one, of which she had never laid eyes on before. Naturally, one eyebrow furrowed and the other arched as the librarian's eyes scanned the cover.

" _Fifty Neighs of Gray,_ " Twilight whispered as her eyes traced the words of the title. The unicorn raised up her head quickly and swung the door open, hoping she could catch the pony who had dropped off this strange book before they had gone too far; they obviously brought their book back to the wrong library thinking it was the correct place. She scanned the area for the possible pony who had left the book, but to her dismay, there was no one in sight. Then, something moving off to her left caught her gaze. On the horizon, moving before the sun that had risen not long ago, was a silhouette rounding the corner of the street at, what looked to be, a full-on gallop. Before Twilight could call after the mystery pony, they were already gone.

"Well, I'll just hold onto it for them until they realize they dropped it off at the wrong place," she spoke aloud, entering the tree along with the book still in her magical grasp. Shutting the door, she set the hardcover down on the center table of the library and walked to her kitchen, figuring breakfast was in order.

"Fifty Neighs of Gray… That's an odd title for a book. I wonder what it's about," she thought aloud, eyeing the book from the doorway of the kitchen. "Maybe it has something to do with color? But why gray? And what does neighing have to do with any of it?"

Twilight's mind began to fill with questions about this new novel that happened to find its way to her library, but no matter how curious her mind was, her stomach made it apparent that it could wait for now, letting out a groan for food. Turning back around and walking the rest of the way into the kitchen, the librarian scoured the cupboards for something to eat until settling on a simple bowl of cereal. Sure, waffles or pancakes sounded great, but Spike was the one in the house who could cook; besides, it would have been unfair of Twilight to make some for herself and not for him (although, he might not have complained if she did, considering he has known the mare his whole life, which included knowing that she is less than spectacular when it came to cooking…)

After pouring milk onto her bowl of cereal, she sat down at the table and ate. The morning was particularly quiet, which was somewhat odd, but nothing disconcerting. It really just made eating oat cereal alone uncomfortable: all that filled her ears was the sound of her crunching and munching on her food, her mind focusing in on every aspect of the sound due to the lack of any other auditory entertainment. She did not like it. Making an attempt to lessen the awkwardness of her situation, Twilight began humming a tune to herself.

Hearing and knowing that she was consciously making noise to cover up the sound of another just brought the whole thing into perspective for her, helping her realize how silly she was behaving. She shook her head and laughed, wondering if anypony else ever had thoughts like hers.

After she stopped humming, Twilight finished her breakfast and walked with the bowl over to the sink. She set it down and was about to walk away, but stopped and decided to wash the bowl and spoon now; there was no point in leaving it for later, was there?

"But that book…" she said, wanting to figure out the mystery of it (even though she was the one who was creating most of the mystery surrounding the novel.) She shook her head.

"No, I'm being ridiculous. I can wash this bowl," she stated. She grabbed the sponge resting on the edge of the sink and began running warm water. "Of course, if I wash this, I should wash the rest of the dishes, too…" she sighed, turning her attention to the left of the sink where the other dirty dishes sat, all three stacks of them.

" _Ugh…_ " she muttered as she let her head hang, but brought it back up and grabbed the first plate. "Let's just get this over with."

* * *

The blankets moved slightly over the wicker basket as the young dragon underneath them began to stir. He rolled over with a groan, attempted to go back to sleep, but ultimately decided that it was about time for him to get up. Throwing the covers off of his head, he grunted as he sat up to see Twilight's empty bed. Glancing over to the window and then to the yellow beams of light entering from it, he would have to say it was around eleven o'clock, give or take ten minutes.

The dragon gave a quick sniff of the air, then sighed. "Whew… good thing she didn't try cooking for herself again." He hopped out of his bed and made his way to the stairs, but stopped when he got to the top of them.

What he saw on the ground floor was a purple mare hunched over something at the center table of the library, every so often letting out either a gasp, nervous laugh, or squeal. The young dragon walked down the stairs as he normally would, keeping an eye on his best friend all the while. He expected her to turn around and say good morning, but she never moved, not even a flinch from when his claw accidentally scraped the bottom step. Thinking this was odd, he walked over to her.

He placed a claw on her shoulder, saying, "Twilight?"

The mare immediately jumped at his touch and voice, pushing whatever she was obsessing over behind her. Her head whipped to him, wide eyes making contact with his equally-surprised ones.

"Spike! What are you doing?!" she shouted at her assistant. "Were you _trying_ to scare me?!"

Spike merely raised an eyebrow at her response. "Uh… no, not really. It's not like I was trying to sneak up on you."

"Well, next time call my name when you're not right beside me." Spike nodded and gave a small chuckle to himself, to which Twilight rolled her eyes.

"So what are you reading there?" he asked. Twilight's whole demeanor changed at that moment.

"What? Read what? Reading? I wasn't reading anything," she spat out, her eyes darting around the whole time, before landing back on a confused Spike.

"But what's that book you have behind you?" he questioned. Just then, a loud pop came from behind Twilight and she stepped aside to reveal nothing behind her, although the young dragon was not fooled.

"Where did you just teleport that book to?" he said flatly, but Twilight sighed in response.

"Look, I was reading a book that was dropped off today by accident, but I can't tell you what it's about," she admitted with her head low, "It's… not appropriate for young dragons. Or anypony as far as I'm concerned."

Spike was quite confused by the whole interaction. "What do you mean 'not appropriate?' I'm old enough! Besides, how bad could it be?"

"Bad enough that I, an adult, find it…" Twilight drifted off as she looked for the correct words to tell Spike. While the book was certainly appalling in its descriptions, it did bring a certain amount of interest to the unicorn. She was brought back from her thoughts by the green eyes of the dragon in front of her. "Um… I find it… not suitable for reading. I plan on finding the pony who left this here and returning it to them so it's not to be found in this library."

" _Awww._ Okay, fine," Spike sighed, disappointed with the fact that he was still treated like a child (even though he really still was a child.) "I'm going to get some breakfast. Did you already eat?"

Twilight nodded. "Yes, I had a bowl of cereal. I washed my bowl after I was done."

"And apparently you didn't think to wash the others?" Spike said in deadpan. Twilight realized she had been so preoccupied with the thought of the book that when she decided to take a short reading break before doing up the dishes, she had completely forgotten about them in the midst of such a lewd but strangely-enticing novel.

The unicorn merely let out a sheepish chuckle before apologizing, to which the dragon shook his head and began to wash the plates before making his own morning meal.

 _Now where did I teleport that book to…?_ Twilight thought to herself, not exactly remembering where she had sent the book during her moment of panic. _I mean, I have to finish it now that I started reading it. For science, of course!_


	2. Rarity

_**Fifty Neighs of Gray: Rarity**_

The sound of light hoof clops echoed throughout the open floor plan of the Carousel Boutique as a white unicorn made her way down the stairs and into the main area of the store. Since it was your typical Sunday morning, things were rather slow; most other shops were closed on Sunday and customers preferred to stay home after a long week.

In her magic grip, she held a basket of fabric she was planning on using in her latest fashion line: Summertime Serenade. She walked up to a work table and set the materials down, then turned and began to walk back up the stairs to grab the second load, but was stopped by a particular sound; something almost of a single loud pop with a tinge of light twinkling.

Facing back around, she scanned the area behind her, seeing if she could spot the source of the strange noise, but she could not see a single thing that was out of place. Shrugging her shoulders, she made her way up the stairs and back into the storage room from whence she came.

Just then, a loud crash came from downstairs, followed by, "Rarity! I'm home!" The voice that called out was high and squeaky, the occasional voice crack accenting points that held the most excitement. The fashionista in question called out from her storage closet.

"In here, Sweetie Belle!" The voice was almost in singsong as the mare worked merrily. "How was breakfast with your friends?"

"It was great! We talked all about what we could do to get our cutie marks and Scootaloo suggested being waitresses, so we asked the lady at the diner if we could try it, but she said to come back in a few years when we were older, but that's okay, because I didn't really want to be a waitress anyway!" The whole monologue was only a whopping two sentences, but it still provided the filly with enough time to make her way across the room, up the stairs, and to the doorway of where her sister was working, never deriving from the volume she spoke with when she had started talking at the front door. Rarity looked up from the pile of cloth she was parked at and brought her gaze to her little sister.

"Well, it certainly sounds like you had quite the time!" she commented before going back to her work, picking out a blue pastel swatch and adding it to her current pile before making her way towards the door.

"So what are you working on?" Sweetie Belle asked, stepping out of the door frame to let her sister through. "Oh, can I help?!"

"I'm working on my newest clothing line for this summer and it's very important that I make everything as quickly as I can as to get a head start on the market this year," she said as she walked down the stairs.

"Oh… so I probably can't help…" the little filly sighed as her head hung. Rarity looked back and saw the dejected look on her sister's face and immediately knew she had to find something for her to do.

Well, at least something mundane for her younger sibling to do that made her feel as if she was helping, when really it was keeping her out of her mane. Rarity's eyes darted around the room before her.

"Oh, nonsense, Sweetie Belle. You can, uh…" Her eyes searched and finally landed upon the basket of cloth she had brought down earlier. "Sort through this pile of cloth. I need to make sure I have the finest materials for my outfits and I know you have a keen eye for beauty."

The filly glared at the basket and then brought her gaze back to her sister. "You're just giving me some task to do to keep me out of your way, aren't you?" she asked in deadpan. Her older sister lowered her head as she let out a sigh.

"Look, Sweetie, I know you want to help, and I am so grateful for that, but this project is very important and it needs to be done as soon as possible," the mare admitted, "But what I said is still true: that pile of cloth does need to be sorted through and it would be another thing that I don't have to worry about. I also wasn't kidding about your eye for beauty."

Sweetie Belle looked up to see her sister's gentle smile and she knew what she was saying was sincere. She smiled back at her and took on a look of determination, raising a hoof to her forehead. "I will pick out only the finest of materials for you! I won't let you down!"

With that, the younger sister trotted over to the wicker basket and began to sort through it. Rarity shook her head at her sister, whom she loved with all of her heart, and walked off to begin working on the designs for her newest project.

 _Now, with her working on that, I can start piecing together the shape and form of my latest designs,_ Rarity thought to herself. She turned and made her way up the stairs and into her designing room, leaving the door open a crack just in case her sister needed her.

Back downstairs, Sweetie Belle was working diligently to meet her older sister's expectations, finding and sorting out only the best quality of fabrics for Rarity's high standards. Her piles were split up into three, easy-to-manage categories: the far left for rejects, the far right for approved pieces, and the middle for the ones she was not quite sure on.

She had gotten about halfway through the wicker basket when she had lifted a square of cloth to reveal a book. Sweetie Belle, being the curious filly she was, set down the fabric she had in hoof and lifted the thick book out of its resting place. It sounded off with a _thunk_ as she set it down on the table, reading over the cover now that it was in better light.

"Fifty Neighs of Gray?" she spoke. The possibilities of what this book could do to this poor, innocent child were close to transitioning from potential to kinetic, eager to wrap their slimy, grotesque tendrils around her mind. It was so close, they could almost taste it. "Sounds pretty boring." With that, she tossed the book to the side and went back to sorting; her childish nature of, "If it doesn't interest me, then I want nothing to do with it," saved her from the raunchy side of being an adult, preserving her youth until a, hopefully, much later date.

* * *

The sorting process took no longer than ten minutes, but in filly time, that was near to an eternity. Sure, she could have left the task to her older sister, but Sweetie was not one to quit when somepony was depending on her, especially when it was her sister. The young unicorn gave a small puff to punctuate finishing her work and nodded at the sorted piles of cloth.

It was not until now that she had noticed the book since she tossed it aside earlier. The filly slid down the table and looked over it once again. The novel that stared back did not seem any more interesting than it did when she had first discovered it, so she decided to just leave it where it laid. Instead, she waltzed over to the bottom of the staircase and looked up.

"Rarity!" she shouted, "I'm done sorting. I'm going to go see if Apple Bloom and Scootaloo want to play. I'll see you later!"

"Oh, okay! I didn't think you would be done so quickly, but before you go, could you plea-"

The door slammed shut and sent a slight jolt through the entirety of the building, cutting off the designer.

"Well, never mind, then. She sure didn't want to stick around for very long, did she? Why, she was only here for about ten minutes…" Rarity thought aloud, but shrugged her shoulders. "Oh well. Fillies will be fillies."

She exited the storage room upstairs and made her descent to the main showroom, which was really more like a multipurpose room, since half was for showing and trying on clothes, while the other half was for measuring, designing, and constructing said clothes. Then again, Rarity was a controlled-chaos designer and worked best that way, so it really was all for the sake of efficiency.

She set the second basket down on the table with all of the organized cloths and materials, but it did not settle like she had expected it to, with it teetering from corner to corner. The fashionista walked around to the other side of the table to see what was causing her basket to be unlevel, finding a large stack of papers bound together and covered with a black, hard material.

"A book? Where did this come from…?" she pondered, taking it out from beneath the basket, "Perhaps Sweetie Belle brought it with her."

She eyed the book's cover and read it aloud: "Fifty Neighs of Gray… Now why does that sound so familiar? Hmm…" she droned, trying to remember why she knew that title. After no more than ten seconds of thought, her eyes sprung open and her jaw dropped as she stared back at the book. Rarity could not hold onto reality for the moment and promptly fainted, only to stand back up mere seconds later.

"Why, I sure hope Sweetie Belle didn't bring this with her! Where could she have gotten her hooves on such scandalous reading material? Why does she have it, though? I know she's growing up, but I thought she would have a few more years before feelings like that began to hit her…"

Rarity could not believe that her sweet little sister had such a naughty book, the designer only knowing of it by word of mouth, never having actually read it herself. It was inaccurate to say that the book had a small reputation, where as it was more accurate to say that it was one of the most raunchy erotic novels around.

"I am going to have to have a serious chat with a certain filly when she gets back home," Rarity announced to the empty room, but she was not sure if she should be angry or consoling; perhaps both? This was all a new experience for her and, frankly, she was not enjoying it.

A cheerful jingle cut its way through the stagnant air of the Carousel Boutique as the front door opened, being pushed by a customer. Had it not been for that bell, Rarity would have most likely been left in her stupor as the customer stood witness to her staring at a whole lot of nothing. Starting with a slight jolt, she quickly hid the book in the basket and tossed a few cloths on top of it. The fashionista shook away the thoughts plaguing her mind and gave a short exhale to set herself back to normal. She then turned to greet the customer: a tall, red unicorn.

"Ah, um, welcome to the Carousel Boutique, where everything is chic and unique!" the white mare managed to get out after being roused from her previous dilemma.

"Hi there! I'm new in town, but I was told I could find the best clothes and fashion here. Is that, by any chance, true?" he said, showing off a friendly smile as he asked.

"Oh, why certainly! Any article of clothing you're looking for or popular fashions you wish to browse are all here and available! If you can't find a specific item, I'd be happy to tailor it for you, free of additional charge," Rarity stated, giving her usual sales pitch. While she may not have been the most graceful when it came to confronting awkward topics, such as her sister reading smut, she was quite the social butterfly when it came to selling her products and conversation in general.

"Perfect! Well, I was wondering if I could see your selection of hats."

"Oh, not a problem at all! Please, right this way," the designer stated, turning and beginning to lead the stallion across the room to a set of shelves, but stopped when she heard the sound of the bells at the front door again. Looking back, she spotted the shameful filly as she entered the building, acting as if she had not been reading erotica in her spare time.

"Oh, if you could please excuse me for a moment, I'll be right back with you," Rarity apologized to the customer before making her way over to her sister. "Oh, Sweetie Belle!"

"Oh, hey Rarity!" she responded, smiling and bouncing over to the table from earlier. "I forgot to grab some cloth for a new project me and the Crusaders are working on. Could I have some of the stuff from here?"

"Yes, yes, if you must, but I have something more important to talk to you about," Rarity said, feeling a slight sweat begin to form across her forehead.

"About what?" Sweetie asked as she shoveled swatches and materials into the basket.

"Well, it will have to be later," she said, checking over her shoulder to make sure her customer was still busy browsing hats, "But I know your secret and to be honest, young lady, I am not pleased."

Sweetie Belle stopped and looked at her sister, genuinely befuddled. "Secret? I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't play dumb with me, young lady! I know exactly what you've been up to." Rarity simply could not believe that her little sister was attempting to lie to her face about the matter at hoof. Her choice on whether to be consoling or angry was showing to be a much easier pick than she had previously thought…

"Um, Miss. Could I ask for your help?" the stallion called from behind her.

"Oh, yes! Just one minute!" the mare replied over her shoulder. "Look, I'm trying not to get angry, but I do not have much of a choice when you think you can lie like this to me," she shot back to her younger sister.

"Rarity, I really don't kno-"

"Ah, ah, ah. Not another word. I will allow you to go with your friends for right now, but when you get back home later, we are going to have a serious talk about you and this newfound feeling of yours." With that, the designer turned and walked back over to the red pony viewing hats.

"What's up with her?" the poor, utterly-confused filly could not help but wonder. She certainly had no idea what her sister was talking about, but apparently she would find out later. With a shrug of her shoulders, she finished loading up the basket with cloth and made her way out the door with it in tow.

"Boy, this sure does feel heavy for just some old rags," she stated as the door to the shop closed behind her.

* * *

"That hat is just perfect for you, darling! Thank you for your business and come back soon!" After what seemed to be an eon of looking back at the same hat, going to the mirror, and asking questions, the red pony finally settled on a hat and was gone. With that, the fashionista closed the door and leaned against the nearest wall, sliding down it until she was on the ground. Exasperated, she let out a long sigh, wondering what she was going to say to her younger sibling later that day.

"Ohh, why do I have to do this? Why couldn't Sweetie Belle just be the darling little filly I thought her to be?" Rarity then stopped, thinking back to the short conversation she held with her sister. "Although, she did seem awfully confused when I confronted her, so much so that it seemed like she really didn't have a clue as to what I was talking about…"

This was all so very frustrating for the older mare. When she really thought about it, why in the world would Sweetie Belle want to read something like that, or how would she even know about a book of that nature to begin with? Her friends certainly did not seem to be the type to know about that topic, either. What if this whole thing _was_ really just a big misunderstanding? Rarity felt a wave of relief wash over her with the thought, allowing her to pick herself up off the floor and regain a feeling of assurance.

"Yes, that's all this is. Just a big misunderstand… WHAT?!" the unicorn exclaimed as she viewed the table. The basket was gone off of the top of it, which meant the book that had been inside was also MIA. She rushed over to the spot and looked beneath it, then returned to the top to check under and behind every scrap of cloth that laid there.

"Oh, no, no, no, this cannot be! Sweetie Belle must have not realized the book was in that basket and left with it!" Rarity exclaimed, but became suspicious as another thought entered her mind, "Or, perhaps Sweetie knew all too well of its whereabouts…"

Rarity began scheming, making up several different stories and scenarios to justify her thinking, whether it were claiming that her dear, little sister was as innocent as she wished she was, or it were the complete opposite. Meanwhile, the filly in question was just about to Sweet Apple Acres, where she would meet up with her friends in their clubhouse for the Cutie Mark Crusaders and begin work on their latest endeavor to gain their cutie marks.

Little did Sweetie know that her basket was so much heavier from a certain, very-inappropriate novel that seemed to be getting around town just fine for a book.


	3. Applejack

_**Fifty Neighs of Gray: Applejack**_

The sun shone onto the young filly as she made her way down the dirt road, the time residing roughly around quarter to noon. Luckily, it was a comfortable temperature that day and the rays of light found themselves under the pleasant reception of her white coat, all the while a slight breeze blowing around and past the young unicorn, leaving her feeling content and rejuvenated.

Well, that is if it were not for one thing: having to lug a wicker basket full of cloth and other material along with her. She still felt like it was heavier than it should have been for just some pieces of fabric, but she unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how one were to look at it) never stopped to question why.

The trip from the Carousel Boutique to Sweet Apple Acres was not a particularly lengthy one, which played into the favor of Sweetie Belle. The walk normally took around five minutes to get from point A to point B, but a few more were tacked on due to her hefty carry-on. When she had finally reached the front gate of the farm, she gave a satisfied puff.

"Now I just have to find Apple Bloom and Scootaloo and show them all of the stuff I brought!" the little filly exclaimed. She left the basket where it sat and began to head into the house, hoping to find her two friends inside. As she reached the porch, a voice stopped her as it called out from the barn. The unicorn, however, did not need to see the source of this voice to know who it was; she had heard the sweet, southern accent plenty of times before.

"Didjya get that stuff ya needed from Rarity?" the apple farmer asked after seeing the filly empty-hoofed.

"Yeah! Rarity actually had me sort through some fabric before I came over the first time, so I just grabbed the ones she didn't want." Sweetie Belle had already stopped at the farm not that long ago to play with her friends after she had helped out her sister back at her shop; however, when she met up with them, they asked if the young unicorn could go back and gather some things they needed in their next attempt at gaining their cutie marks, hence the trip back for the basket.

Sweetie Belle turned and looked towards the front gate. "I left the basket back there. I was going to find Apple Bloom and Scootaloo first and then I'd come back and get it."

"Ah, well those two are inside gettin' lunch. How 'bout ya go on in and join 'em while I take care of that there basket for ya?"

"That'd be great! Thank you, Applejack! You're the best!" the filly squealed. She had been dreading the thought of hauling the basket the rest of the distance to the clubhouse, so the offer was warmly welcomed. The unicorn turned and was just about to bound into the house before being called back.

"Whoa there, filly! Where exactly should Ah be takin' 'em?" the farm pony asked. Sweetie let out a small giggle.

"Ohh, right. Sorry! To the clubhouse; we'll be using them there."

Applejack nodded and smiled. "All righty, then. Now go on in and enjoy yer lunch. Yer basket of fancy rags will be there when yer done."

Sweetie Belle thanked the mare once again and made her way inside for what smelled to be sandwiches and juice.

Applejack could not help but let out a slight chuckle before shaking her head and walking over to the wicker container. She peered in to see a conglomeration of gaudy and garish fabrics, each as much of an eyesore as the next.

"Oh boy," she commented, "Ah can only imagine what the Crusaders have in store fer all this." With that, the farm pony grabbed ahold of the basket to hoist it onto her back, but was surprised by its lack of cooperation.

"What in tarnation?" she wondered aloud. It was nowhere near too heavy for her to lift, but she certainly was not expecting a basket made of wicker with the addition of the cloth inside to be as hefty as it was. Bending down closer, she began to dig her way through all of the material inside until her hoof struck something solid. She brushed the remaining pieces of fabric out of the way.

"Now what do we have here?" Applejack questioned, picking the object up and out of its resting place. "A book? Looks like Sweetie Belle is tryin' to catch up on some readin'," the farmer joked.

She eyed the title, its gold lettering reflecting the beams from the sun: "Fifty Neighs of Gray? Ohh, it must be about colors! That'd make sense with all those, uh, _eye-catchin'_ rags she's got there. But honestly, that doesn't sound like a very colorful book…"

With her interest piqued and curiosity running rampant, Applejack opened to a random page to see what a book dealing with gray could tell somepony about colors. The first thing she noticed was the lack of pictures; in fact, there were only words spread across the pages, which did not seem like something a color-oriented book (even if it were just about gray and the fifty neighs one gave over it) would lack. She flipped through and watched the pages flutter past, seeing every slip of paper covered in walls of words. Now even more confused, Applejack stopped and decided to read, hoping she would figure out this colorless-caper of a book.

As her eyes met with the first paragraph of the page, they slowly grew in shock until she could not be faced to read anymore. The farm pony felt sullied by what she had just viewed, but her heart skipped a beat as she remembered where the book originally sat before she had happened upon it.

"No… No, there's no way! Ah just can't believe that Sweetie Belle has been readin' this kind of junk. Her sister, maybe, but-" The earth pony halted her words as she realized the answer had just left her lips. "Of course! This here blasted book is Rarity's! Must've ended up in this basket on accident."

Applejack let out a sigh, feeling relieved from her small panic attack. It all made sense now: the book had to have fallen into the basket or it was already residing within and Sweetie Belle just never realized, so she left with it, remaining unaware the whole time. Applejack could not believe Rarity, though, and how she could leave erotic material lying around so foolishly where her innocent little sister could unintentionally stumble upon it. While the farmer could not judge her best friend for what she participated in during her spare time, it was plainly irresponsible for her to let something like that slip. She would have to have a conversation with her friend about censorship later on to make sure she would take more care in where she stored her uncouth reading material.

"Um… Applejack?" The mare jumped at the voice that spoke up behind her. Out of instinct, she dipped her head down and slipped the book underneath her Stetson, the hat just large of being a perfect fit.

The action was a common one that Applejack had adopted for when she had to hide something quickly, which started when she was little: deciding to play a prank on her Granny Smith, the younger Applejack had planned on taking the older mare's dentures and hiding them, but her grandmother walked in just after she had snatched them from the glass of water, so, after a short second of quick thinking, she placed them upon her head (as gross as that seemed), covering them with the same hat she wore to this day. The skill still proved useful, such as when the farm pony would take the last brownie that Big Mac had already claimed for himself, or, in this instance, trying to hide an erotic-fiction novel from fillies…

"Applejack, what are you doin'?" The pony in question lifted her head back up from hiding the book and about faced, trying to produce the most natural smile she could after being startled from her thoughts on a topic that should be hidden from the minds of fillies.

"Um, well, Ah-"

"I thought you said you would take the basket to the clubhouse for us," Sweetie Belle stated, recalling the conversation that took place not even five minutes ago. The filly did not expect the grown pony to have delivered the basket and been back during the time she had gone inside to eat, but she should have at least been on her way.

"Well, ya see-"

"And why are some of the cloths on the ground?" Apple Bloom questioned after taking notice of how it seemed to be as if her sister had been digging through the wicker container.

"Oh, that's 'cause, uh…"

"And why are you acting so strange, like you're hiding something?" Scootaloo noted. Normally, the young pony was only focused on scootering around and talking about Rainbow Dash, so her observation took them by surprise, but she was not wrong: Applejack did seem to be looking a tad bit guilty.

"Stop!" the mare burst out, losing her poise from the relentless interrogation. The three little ones that stood before her held looks of bewilderment. Applejack drew in a breath to regain her composure.

"What Ah'm tryin' to say is, uh…" She had to think with haste for an excuse that would satisfy all of their queries while simultaneously not sounding too outlandish for her reply to be unconvincing. Because she was the embodiment of the element of honesty, lying was not exactly her forte, so she tried thinking of the best fibber she knew. The first pony that arrived to the doorstep of her mind was Rarity, and considering how fitting of a role that seemed for the current situation, Applejack rolled with it, channeling her inner Rarity.

"Ah've always wanted to get into sewin' and stuff like that!" was the answer the farm pony came off with, instantly giving herself a mental smack to the forehead. If the fillies were not thoroughly confused by this point, they certainly were now.

"R-really?" Scootaloo cautiously asked after hearing this untold piece of information. She glanced over to Apple Bloom on her left, looking to see if this statement were true. Her friend merely shared the same befuddled look as her.

"Uh, yeah! Ah figured it couldn't hurt to know how. And ya never know, it could be fun!" Applejack was really stretching for material at this point, trying to feed them only as much as they needed before they believed her lie. "Ah just couldn't help but, uh, look at all these fancy rag- er, fabrics you got here." Applejack inadvertently let out an uneasy laugh.

"It's just weird, because you're starting to sound like Rarity," Sweetie Belle joked, letting out a soft giggle. The farmer decided to take that as a compliment, considering that was who she was attempting to adopt the mindset of.

"Yeah, well, Ah guess she's been rubbin' off on me lately." Another lie. Applejack did not know how much more of this she could take. She had to get them to stop questioning her. "All right, so how 'bout we get all this stuff to yer little tree house, then?"

Without taking the time to wait for a response, Applejack had already grabbed the stray pieces of cloth that sat on the ground, tossed them into the basket with the rest, and swung the whole thing up onto her back and began to trot off into the fields. The trio that was left behind glanced around at each other, attempting to gather what the others thought of the whole interaction that had just taken place, until they all shrugged in unison and took off to catch up.

* * *

"Welp, here we are! Cutie Mark Crusaders headquarters, found in the one-and-only Sweet Apple Acres apple and produce farm," Applejack declared with the improvised title and introduction, which betrayed the little shack that was hoisted into a tree (not to say it was unimpressive, because let's face it, all tree houses are cool.)

"Thanks Applejack! I _really_ wasn't looking forward to fighting with that basket all the way here," Sweetie Belle said.

"Aw heck, Sweetie! We would've helped ya," Apple Bloom responded, smiling to her friend.

"Yeah! We wouldn't have let you carry that all by yourself," Scootaloo added.

"Aww! Thanks, guys. You're the best!" Sweetie Belle then reached around and wrangled her two best friends into a group hug, arousing a soft smile from Applejack. It always warmed her heart to see her little sister harboring such a close relationship with her friends. The apple farmer grew up not truly understand her purpose in life until she ventured back to her family's farm after visiting her Aunt and Uncle Orange in the city in an inauspicious attempt to discover herself, so making friends was not exactly the easiest task for her; the only ponies who she was close with at the time were her brother and grandmother. To see these three young girls, who were all going through the same debilitating identity crisis as Applejack had, finding comfort in each other was gladdening.

"So Applejack, didjya wanna help us?" Apple Bloom asked, surprising her unassuming older sister.

"Me? Help? Why do ya ask that?" she questioned, truthfully uncertain.

"Well, ya were sayin' how ya always wanted to get into sewin', so Ah was thinkin' maybe ya could try it by helpin' us!" the younger pony explained.

 _Darn, Ah forgot about that…_ she thought to herself. Expelling the thought, she searched for a response.

"Oh gee, that's a real kind offer, but Ah don't even know what y'all are lookin' to do with this stuff," she admitted. While she did lie earlier about wanting to try her hoof at sewing, Applejack did not have to save face here: it really was a thoughtful offer and she was still absolutely clueless as to what the three of them were attempting to achieve.

"Oh yeah, we never told you! We're gonna get our cutie marks in quilting!" Scootaloo shouted, seeming much more excited about the idea than a high-strung filly, such as herself, should have been. "Well, or at least try to."

"Right… and y'all really wanna get yer cutie marks in quiltin'?" Applejack asked them. The three shared looks of questioning, trying to decipher what the others were thinking so they could form their own separate opinions.

Scootaloo spoke up first: "Uh, well… now that you mention it, not really. I mean, I kinda just went along with it 'cause I thought you guys wanted to."

"Really? That's the only reason Ah agreed to it, too," Apple Bloom admitted. The two then turned their attention to Sweetie Belle.

"Oh, I actually wanted to give it a try. We don't have to do it, though," she said with a smile, not sounding upset or disappointed, but more candid or artless; the white filly genuinely did not care what they did, as long as she was able to spend her time with her friends.

"Well, now what are we going to do with all this cloth?" Scootaloo asked the rest of the group. They all turned up with no answers, leaving them somewhat dejected as a group.

"Aw shoot, so that means we don't have anythin' to do to get our cutie marks," Apple Bloom sighed, plopping down on the ground and tossing her head atop her hoof in disappointment. A collective, "Aw…" came from the other two as they followed her lead and assumed the same position. Applejack could not stand to let these fillies remain upset like this.

"Well, Ah guess y'all could still try for them quiltin' cutie marks if ya don't have anything else goin' on," she suggested. "Y'know, just in case it really _is_ one of yer special talents."

"And you'll help?!" Sweetie Belle asked, instantly shooting up from her minor bout of depression. Applejack sighed.

"Ah guess if y'all want me to, Ah will."

"Yay! Cutie Mark Crusaders quilters! Yay!" the three of them cried out in unison, making for a somewhat-cute, but mostly-shrill cheer for their little team. After wincing from the initial shout, the mare smiled and shook her head as she went to follow them into their clubhouse.

This doddering of her noggin resulted in the extra weight placed on top of it to shift slightly, not so much to have it become exposed, but just enough for it to remind the farmer of what she was concealing. She certainly did not want to have to endure attempting to sew in front of both her sister and her friends, all the while having to concentrate on keeping her head steady as she balanced a book (and not a particularly light one at that) atop her head so it would not slide off and fall to the floor, only for it to be exposed to the innocent fillies.

The three younger ponies began walking up the ramp and into the tree house, allowing Applejack to sporadically search for a spot to ditch the book where the others would not find it, but also somewhere she would be able to retrieve it afterwards in order to return it to Rarity. Just as she was close to exhausting her options, Applejack picked up on a loud, whooshing sound coming from the sky directly above her. Upon closer observation, she realized it was her good friend, Rainbow Dash. The farm pony knew this was the answer she had been looking for.

"Hey, Rainbow!" she called up to the pegasus, hoping to catch her attention before it was too late and she had flown past. Thankfully, the flying mare caught her name through the sound of the wind rushing past her ears, causing her to look down and search out the source. Realizing who it was, she slowed and began her descent, landing ever-so-delicately before flashing a smile to her friend.

"Hey there, AJ! What's up?" she quipped, but was startled when she was jerked away from where they stood and over behind a nearby tree. Applejack checked around the trunk to determine if they were well out of earshot of the fillies. "Whoa, hey! What are yo-?"

"Shh! Ah don't want the youngins to hear," the farmer whispered, nodding her head towards the small shack placed up in the tree, standing only twenty-or-so feet away. Rainbow adopted a look of discomfiture, which beckoned her friend to elaborate. Applejack gave a quick sigh to steady herself.

"So, Sweetie Belle came over from her place today to play with her friends and do somethin' to get their cutie marks," she began.

"Wow, that's hard to believe," Rainbow joked with the sarcasm-laced statement. The farmer rolled her eyes and continued.

"Anywho, when she got to the farm, she had this big ol' basket full of old rags and cloth to help with their project. Ah told her to head on inside to get some lunch with the others and Ah'd bring her basket here. Only thing was, when Ah picked it up, it sure seemed heavier than it looked." As she spoke, Applejack lifted her hat and revealed the book to her friend, continuing with her story: "So Ah went on ahead and poked my way through and found this here book."

Rainbow Dash eyed the cover and gave a shrug. "Looks pretty boring to me."

"That's what Ah thought too. Ah figured it had somethin' to do with colors, considerin' they had all those cloths. It didn't make any sense to me, so Ah decided to take a peek inside and what Ah found was… well, let's say it's not exactly somethin' a filly Sweetie's age needs to be readin'." Rainbow's eyes grew larger as she began to understand what the apple farmer was implying. It then clicked in her mind what this book could possibly be.

"Wait a second," she stated, stopping Applejack, "This isn't that really dirty book I've heard about, is it?"

"Ah don't know. Was it called Fifty Neighs of Gray?" Applejack asked, reading the title from the cover of the novel.

"I don't know, but it does sound familiar."

"Hey, how come you know about this?" the earth pony questioned.

"Don't even get any ideas, Applejack. I just know about it because of talk around the weather team. I don't read crud like that. Daring-Do is all I will ever need!" she answered, putting her friend's suspicions at ease.

"Yeah, okay RD, whatever ya say," she said with a smirk.

"Ha. Ha," she deadpanned, "Very funny. So why did Sweetie Belle have the book?"

"Well ya see, Ah was thinkin' it was Rarity's and somehow it found its way into the basket, so Ah was gonna run over there and give it back, but also give her mah two-sense on keepin' stuff like this somewhere a bit safer."

"All right, makes sense. So then why did you call me down here? You don't want me to babysit, do you?" she asked as she glanced over to the tree house, seeing the three girls already starting to make a mess, "Because I'm really busy right now with, uh… flight practice and… stuff."

"Calm down, girl! Ah'm not askin' ya to babysit. Actually, just the opposite. Ah need ya to hold onto the book until Ah can take it back later," the mare explained, "Can ya do that fer me?"

Rainbow looked to Applejack, then to the book, and then brought her gaze back to Applejack before grabbing the book and grinning. "You can count on me!"

"Atta girl! Now don't bring it back 'til later. Ah'm gonna be more busy than a bee during honey season with these girls." Almost as if they were listening in on the conversation between the two mares, the girls from within the clubhouse poked their heads out the door and called, "Applejack! Come help us! We need somepony to run the needle while we hold the fabric!"

After heaving a hefty sigh (surely with more to follow) from deep within her bosom, Applejack placed her Stetson atop her head and trotted back over to the base of the ramp, sans erotic novel, before looking over her shoulder and giving a wave to her friend, then watching her take off with lewd luggage in tow.

"Was that Rainbow Dash?!" Scootaloo gasped, waving exuberantly to an unassuming Rainbow as she bolted away.

"What was she doin' here?" Apple Bloom asked her sister as she reached the top of the slope.

"Oh, nothin'. Just stopped to say hi," Applejack stated, lying yet again. She noted that it seemed to almost be getting easier, which bothered her. She would have to refrain from lying as much as possible, just in case it started to form as a bad habit.

"Oh, all right. Well, ready to get sewin'?!" Apple Bloom exclaimed, swinging open the door of the Cutie Mark Crusader clubhouse to reveal eccentric cloth and fabric strewn about; a huge, multicolored wad of thread and needles piled in the corner; and Sweetie Belle covered in golden glitter (along with traces of it left where she had been). In other words: a complete and utter mess.

"This is going to be so much fun!" the shining filly squealed, bits of glimmering dust trickling to the floor beneath her with every movement.

Applejack quickly realized that remaining truthful was going to be easier said than done with how her evening was beginning to take shape.


	4. Rainbow Dash

_**Fifty Neighs of Gray: Rainbow Dash**_

Air whistled in the ears of the speeding pegasus as she raced through the sky above Ponyville. Everypony that she saw walking or trotting along the roads beneath her seemed so small. All the while, they never thought twice about looking up to see who they would find soaring above.

To Rainbow Dash's relief, she was able to fly the entire way home from her stop at Sweet Apple Acres (which was located on the other side of town) without being spotted nor stopped; granted, it was only a five-minute-long flight—placing the time around quarter after noon—but the fact that she was actively avoiding being spotted made for a tense trip home. More often than not, she was one of the most well-disposed ponies to stop and have a chat with her friends, but because of her current task at hoof, she had wished to receive as little acknowledgment as she was physically able to.

She landed at the steps that lead to her front door with the grace and style of the skilled flier she was, drawing in and releasing a deep breath of relief knowing that she was safe in the comfort of her own home with nopony around to bother her or accidentally bump into. The large door of the cloud building swung open easily as Rainbow trotted in. She stopped and kicked out a hind leg, connecting with the door and thrusting it back into its original position. One would think the impact would cause some sort of terrible, echoing report throughout the building, but living in a house made of cloud proved again and again to have its benefits.

Eyeing the couch that sat in the center of the living room, Rainbow pounced from where she stood—managing to toss the book she had been carrying onto the table, mid-flight—and plopped onto the plush cushions, stretching out her legs and wings, letting loose a monstrous yawn, and then relaxing everything, from the tips of her ears to her nonexistent horse toes. Reaching up, she placed her forehooves behind her head and crossed her legs as she laid on her back.

"Ahh…" she groaned, "Life is good."

The usually-loud mare sat still and admired how quiet her home was. There was not much to make noise in a cloud house floating over one hundred feet above the ground; not even the sound of wind was present. She closed her eyes and listened to what was around her, as if she were challenging her surroundings to see if they could produce any sort of noise. The fibers of the couch were still settling beneath her, crackling as they shifted to a more natural position under her weight; other than that, the whole building was completely sile-

 _BANG_

The crash came from upstairs, loud and abrupt. What could it possibly be? The wind? A stray book that was left too close to the edge of its shelf? Perhaps even burglars?

All of these would be likely choices for any other pony, but this was Rainbow Dash's house, and nopony knew it—or rather, in this case, its occupants—better than her. The rainbow-maned pegasus chuckled and shook her head.

"Tank, I'm home!" she shouted with a hoof to the side of her mouth. Several more crashes, bangs, booms, and other similar onomatopoeia followed, progressively getting louder and closer before they reached the top of the stairs to reveal an elated tortoise with a magic-powered propeller attached to his back as a means of locomotion. Such an absurd concept, let alone sight to behold, would surely be humorous, but Tank was Rainbow's pet and best friend; she loved him with all of her heart, even despite facing a literal and metaphorical rocky beginning. She swung her front legs over her head and used the momentum to set herself upright.

"C'mere, boy!" she called, forelegs outstretched as she sat on the couch. Tank took a second to process her words before tilting forward and taking off, flying down the steps to his owner.

The biggest issue with having a flying tortoise as a pet is that they do not exactly possess the quickest processing capabilities, making fast (let alone flighted) maneuvers nothing but impossible for a creature that performs actions a full two seconds after initially thinking them.

Rainbow Dash, of course, knew this all too well, getting plenty out of the way of her soaring cannonball of a pet as he crashed into the soft back of the couch, falling onto a cushion beneath him. He looked up at her from where he laid and slowly smiled. Dash's heart squealed over her beloved pet and how adorable he was, something she normally would not be able to do if any of her friends were present: she had a reputation to uphold as the coolest pony around, and gushing over a pet was definitely not "cool" (according to whom, no pony was quite sure, but it was an idea she had stuck in her head ever since first owning her pet tortoise.)

"Oh, Tank, I wuv yooou," she cooed as she picked him up and took off the flying contraption. She set him on top of her and snuggled with the reptile.

"So what'd ya do while I was gone?" she asked him as she pulled out of the hug.

He stared blankly before letting out a yawn.

"Ah, took a nap, huh? Sounds like a good time," she responded, her mouth gaping and yawning herself. "Actually, a nap sounds pretty good right about now."

The tortoise tilted his head to one side as he looked at the mare, his face blank aside from the slight, relaxed grin he always wore.

"What did I do while I was gone?" she asked him, as if he had said it himself. "You know what I did, ya goof: I went to work."

His head did not move from where it was, beckoning for something more.

"Yeah, I know I was a few minutes late getting home; I just stopped at AJ's for a sec to say hi."

There was still no movement from the tortoise.

"Yes, I'm _sure_ it was just to say hi. What else would it be for?"

Tank slowly turned to the table and looked directly at the book Rainbow had brought home with her, a perfect example of how what Tank lacked in speed he made up for in awareness. The mare panicked and got the tortoise off of her as quickly as she could without hurting him and snatched the novel off the coffee table, hiding it behind her back in a manner that only a cartoon character would believe to be effective.

Tank turned in position until he was facing Rainbow, the same expression still planted on his face.

"What? No! I don't have anything! I'm, uh, cleaning up: a bit of spring cleaning!"

His gaze went to the window to show a hot, blazing sun, the tips of the trees that were visible from the airborne house already covered in green leaves.

"So what if it's the middle of summer? You know I'm late sometimes." She could feel herself being backed into a corner by the relentless interrogation, unsure of how much longer she could keep avoiding the questions being hurled at her. The gaze that shone from the eyes of her pet went straight through her and peered into the depths of her mind, inflicting increasingly-uncomfortable feelings. Finally, she broke.

"Okay!" she cried out, "Sweet Celestia, _okay_! I give! I was late getting home because AJ stopped me to give me this book." As she spoke, she pulled the novel out from behind her. She then realized that even though her pet seemingly possessed otherworldly omnipotence regarding the knowledge of what others were thinking and soul-piercing eyes capable of prying the answers he needed from ponies, the content that resided within the book was far too risqué for a kind-hearted tortoise like him. (Okay, so maybe she was over-exaggerating the whole "omnipotence" thing a tad, but her point was still present: this was a dirty book and she did not want to have to explain it to her pet tortoise.)

"Actually," she spoke out from her train of thought, "How do reptiles even do that stuff? Is it like how ponies do it where they get together in a bedroom and…" She glanced down at the green critter on the couch to see his innocent smile. "Um, maybe I shouldn't really go into detail."

Now that she was on the topic of such acts, the mare was genuinely curious as to how reptiles went about fornicating. She knew eggs were involved, but other than that, she was mostly clueless. This also brought up the point that she would have to learn more about this if she were ever to educate Tank on the subject so he could be safe and keep far away from tortoise STDs (if such a thing even existed.)

"You know what, Tank? I think we're going to take a little trip to a certain somepony for some advice on reptile reproduction." With that, Rainbow set Tank back up with his magically-powered propeller and made her way to the door with tortoise in suit. Once the two were outside, they took off to find the mare Dash had in mind for such an animal question.

* * *

The seamstress tried desperately to make something—anything, really—in an attempt to get her mind off of her sister. It had been almost an hour and a half since the initial discovery of Sweetie Belle's smut, but it had not left her mind once, even as customers came and went. Rarity was less upset about her sister reading erotica or lying to her, and more shocked by how out-of-character it seemed for her: a kind, loving, and innocent child like Sweetie reading such vile and dirty words, especially at such a young age.

She began to question where she went wrong in raising her younger sister. Well, not that their parents were gone or dead, as they were in Applejack's case, but rather her sister was always with her much more often than their parents. Rarity could only imagine what behavior she exhibited that influenced Sweetie to pick up on reading raunchy material. Perhaps it was how she would sometimes joke with her friends, or maybe the filly picked up on such things from the gossip that circles through the shop as customers talk. Could it be how the mare lived? Was she just not strict enough?

"Well, I know for a fact that it is disgusting. I mean, _I_ would never read anything like that."

There was a moment where she went back to work after she spoke—only a few short seconds—before her eyes went wide as the reality of what she had said hit her.

"Oh my… I _do_ read things like that. A lot of things like that! Ooo, curse me and my hypocritical self! I am the exact reason why my darling little sister has taken to this foul taste for lewd reading!" she cursed aloud while slumping to the ground, her head buried in her hooves and her mind tangled within feelings of self-loathing and frustration.

"None of this would have even happened if I had just stayed away from those rotten books like I swore I would." She paused before sighing. "But they're _sooo_ dreamy. The thought of a strong, handsome stallion and a petite, beautiful mare in such a situation…" The seamstress squealed and giddily kicked at the air as the fantasy ran through her mind.

"No! Stop this at once, Rarity! This is the reason why your sister has changed. You must become a better role model! I'll have to find a place to get rid of my books (as much as I don't want to…), but starting now, I am through with reading erotica!"

"Uh… Rarity?"

The mare yelped at the sudden presence in the room before spinning around to see a purple unicorn staring back from the front door.

"Oh, Twilight! Um… ahem, how are you, dear?" Rarity spoke, the words practically stumbling out of her mouth.

"I'm… all right," she said, then quickly turning her limp mouth into a smile that did not know what it was smiling about. Rarity cut the act and dropped her head in shame.

"How much of that did you hear?" Twilight abandoned the facade as well.

"How far back was, 'None of this would've happened if I had stayed away from those rotten books?' "

Rarity sighed. "I'm sorry, Twilight. I must've been so caught up in my thoughts that I didn't hear you come in," she explained. "I'm not exactly proud of what I read in my free time. I understand if you think I'm some sort of disgusting creep or disturbed indivi-"

"Actually, I'm kinda in the same boat," Twilight spoke up, "And if you're interested in getting rid of a few of your books, maybe I could take them off your hooves…?" she questioned, a blush beginning to show as she shied away with embarrassment.

Rarity was absolutely stunned. " _What?!_ You read erotica? Twilight, I never knew! This is great news!"

"It is?" she questioned.

"Of course! Why, now we can talk about these things! It just gives us another aspect we can relate to each other with. Tell me, what is your favorite book you've read?"

"Actually, I haven't read any yet…"

Rarity's giddy smile broke slightly. "What do you mean, darling?"

"Well, I've read a bit of one, but I haven't finished it," she explained, "But what I've read so far I find very… enjoyable."

"Oh, I see, I see. Well, what's the book called?"

"It's called Fifty Neighs of Gray. I found it this morning when somepony dropped it off in the library book dropbox. I think they might have confused my library for another one, because I've never seen a blah blah, blah blah blah. Blah blah…" As Twilight continued to speak, Rarity's focus shifted inward.

 _Fifty Neighs of Gray? Wait, if that's her book, then maybe Sweetie Belle is still my innocent little cherub! Oh, goodness, this is great news! But how in the world did Sweetie get ahold of it?_

"-ity? Rarity?" The unicorn's voice started to come back into the foreground as the fashionista saw her friend looking at her with an arched eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, darling. My mind was elsewhere. What did you say?"

"I asked if you've seen my book," she repeated through her awkward-but-hopeful smile.

"Oh, yes, I have, but why would it be here in the first place?" Rarity questioned.

"Wait, did you even hear anything I just said?"

"Um… perhaps you could repeat yourself?" she requested as a meek grin crept onto her face.

Twilight rolled her eyes and breathed in. "I said that after Spike walked in on me reading the book, I panicked and teleported it somewhere. After I sat and thought about it, I vaguely remembered thinking of here, right after underneath my bed (which I checked and it wasn't there), so I figured this would be the next likely spot, which it is!" she cheered. "So where's the book?"

"Teleported it here earlier today, hmm? Ohh, it all makes sense now! I remember this morning hearing something like that, but I didn't think anything of it at the time; it must have been in that basket I had Sweetie Belle go through!" she exclaimed, "Oh, thank goodness! She _is_ still innocent!"

"What are you talking about? Sweetie Belle didn't read the book, did she?!" Twilight fretted.

"Oh, not at all, dear. At least I don't think so, but I'm fairly certain about that. Unfortunately, I don't have your book, but I know where it went. Hopefully, with any stroke of luck, Sweetie Belle and her friends haven't read it yet."

" _What?!_ You _gave_ them the book?!"

"Well, not intentionally… but if we hurry, we might be able to get it befo-"

At that moment, the front door of the shop burst open to reveal a peeved, exhausted, and somewhat-sparkly farm pony.

"Consarnit, Rarity! Y'all need to learn how to keep yer filthy, stinkin' books to yerself!" she shouted from the doorframe, not even taking the time to close it before letting loose.

Twilight attempted to intervene: "Applejack, what in Equestria happened?"

"Ah'll tell ya what happened: Rarity let her lil' sis parade around with some nasty book of hers."

"I have told you before, Applejack, just because you don't like them doesn't mean you have to be so rude about it!" Rarity shot back.

"Normally Ah wouldn't care, but ya left one right in yer basket of rags for Sweetie Belle to bring over for her and her friends. If them lil' ones found and read that book, they'd be ruined! They ain't ready fer that yet and ya know it!"

"I get what you're saying, dear, but you have to believe me that I didn't mean for her to take that with her. It's not even my book!"

"Oh, 'course it ain't. Then whose is it?" the farmer questioned.

"Why, it's Twili-" As she spoke, Rarity could see a look from her unicorn friend out of the corner of her eye that begged her not to give away the librarian's dirty, little secret. Unfortunately, the words were already out of her mouth and into the ears of Applejack by the time it had all registered. The earth pony gave a look of disappointment with a tinge of disgust to the purple pony.

"Ah shoot, not you too, Twilight!" she spoke, not in a harsh tone, but closer to somepony who was in an argument and their last hope for support switched to the enemy team. Twilight was so embarrassed that she wished she could curl into a ball and hide from the ponies around her; Rarity was one thing, since she was into reading erotica as well, but the situation was completely different with how she felt like Applejack was scolding her.

"Look, this is all just a big misunderstanding. Twilight teleported the book here earlier today to hide it from Spike and I didn't know it was here until I found it after Sweetie Belle had left, so I actually thought it was hers. None of this was intentional and, luckily, we're the only three to have seen it," Rarity explained to her friend, seeming to calm her down somewhat. "I mean, we _are_ the only ones, right?"

It was now Applejack's turn to feel embarrassed in front of her two friends. "Well, actually, we ain't…"

Rarity locked a crazed look onto the mare. "Applejack, darling. Please, in the sweet names of Celestia and Luna, tell me the fillies haven't read the book."

"Oh, gosh no! Ah found it before they did, thankfully. Ah'm talkin' about RD," she explained.

"Rainbow Dash? How does she know about it?" The question came from Twilight, who had crawled out of her cocoon to join in on the conversation.

"Well, ya see, when Ah found the book, it was in Sweetie's basket. Ah was supposed to take it to their clubhouse while they grabbed some lunch from inside the house, so when they came out and caught me gawking at the book, Ah hid it and gave 'em the excuse that I was admirin' their fancy cloths. 'Course, that gave 'em the idea to have me quilt with 'em…" She was interrupted by the stifled snickering of her two friends as the thought of the rough-n-tumble farmer sewing quilts played in their heads. With a long roll of her eyes, she continued: "So when we came up on the tree house, Ah told the three of 'em to go on inside and Ah'd be right in after 'em. Really, Ah was lookin' for a spot to stash the book so Ah didn't have to have it sittin' on mah head the whole time. Luckily fer me, RD just so happened to be flyin' overhead, so Ah called her down and asked if she could hold onto it while Ah was with the fillies."

"So Rainbow Dash has the book right now?" Rarity questioned.

"Ah reckon so."

"Oh, this is terrific news! The fillies haven't seen it, we know where it is, and I can get it back so I can finish reading it!" Twilight spoke as giddy as a little school filly. "Um, I mean, so I can keep it from getting into anypony else's hooves, heh heh…"

Rarity and Applejack shook their heads in tandem at their friend and her excitement towards her newfound pastime.

"Well, in that case, shall we head over to retrieve the book?" Rarity suggested.

The farmer agreed. "Ah believe that would be the best idea."

"Well, in that case, I'll get the hot air balloon ready and we'll leave ASAP!" Twilight proclaimed. Her horn glowed bright and with a pop and a twinkle, she had vanished, leaving the Yin and Yang of their group of friends alone in the boutique. Applejack looked over to Rarity and glanced up at her horn.

"Say, how come you can't do that?" she asked, referring to Twilight and her ability to teleport.

"I have no idea, dear. I've always been envious of the power, but I have a feeling that there is a good reason why; almost as if there is some sort of writer scrawling out the stories of our lives and every event that takes place within them, so I would like to assume that they have a purpose for it." The fashionista looked up as if she were making direct contact with this being—this author—she believed in. Applejack moved next to her and looked to the same point while the same soft smile her friend had spread to her own face.

She gave a peaceful sigh before speaking: "Rarity?"

"Mmhmm?" she answered, neither of them looking away from above.

"Yer nuts."

* * *

As the basket of the balloon lifted off the ground, the three of them swayed on their legs slightly to adjust to their new platform. Neither Applejack or Rarity knew exactly how Twilight was so experienced in piloting hot air balloons, nor did they ask her about it. The group of friends had gone out to eat one night, but Twilight was unable to make it, so the question had worked its way into the position of that night's discussion topic.

Rarity proposed that, because Twilight was so studious, she had read books on the subject and that was how she knew. Applejack and Fluttershy agreed and said it was the most logical and reasonable explanation.

Pinkie Pie had believed that Celestia would often take Twilight on balloon rides when she was little and she had picked up on how to fly one that way. The others agreed that this, too, was also plausible.

Rainbow Dash, however, suggested that because Twilight was taught and practically raised in the Canterlot castle, she had to undergo some sort of military training as well, and learning how to pilot a balloon was just one of the many things taught, right next to hoof-to-hoof combat and battlefield attack/defense strategizing. Everypony there had shook their heads at the ridiculous thought except for Pinkie, who wanted to change her answer to what Rainbow had said because hers was "way cooler!"

That same question ran through both of their minds once again as Twilight soared the three of them above the earth. In the distance, a white structure floating a good one hundred feet above the ground came into shape with spouts of color trickling off into nothing after shooting and flowing out of and down it.

"There it is!" Applejack spoke up, "Rainbow's house. Now she'll have the book, but she won't get why you two are with me, so we'll probably have to explain what all's been goin' on."

"That's fine, but if we could please keep from telling her that it's _my_ book and _I'm_ reading it, then that'd be great," Twilight said, hoping that she could keep her secret to the confines of her and her two friends.

"Of course, dear. We'll make sure to keep things under wraps," Rarity gave a quick nod of appreciation before turning a few knobs above them, causing the balloon to slow as they reached their destination. The basket bumped into the base of the cloud, sending a few small puffs into the air until they dissipated and faded away.

"All right, give me a second to cast the cloud-walker spell and then we can head inside." With that, the purple mare's horn began to glow, encircling the three of them in an amaranthine aura. They all felt a tinge of fuzz in their hooves, as if their limbs had fallen asleep, before subsiding to an icy wave that shot down their legs and stopped at the tips of their hooves, leaving them feeling completely normal, as if nothing had changed at all. Applejack and Rarity glanced at each other, wondering if Twilight had even done anything to them at all.

"Now, let's get that book back!" The librarian placed her forelegs on the edge of the basket and vaulted her way over, sending her friends' stomachs into their throats as both of them expected her to sink straight through the clouds and plummet to the solid ground below, ending up as a gruesome Twilight pancake. Fortunately, her confidence was well-placed and she landed firmly on the clouds, peachy-keen and unharmed. She turned back to see the distraught looks on her friends' faces.

"What are you two waiting for? Let's get going!"

The two mares shared another look with each other before slowly and cautiously making their way onto the plush surface, poking and prodding the white stuff before placing their full weight onto it.

"And here Ah thought Pinkie Pie was the crazy one in our group," Applejack remarked. She rocked from hoof to hoof, becoming accustomed to the comforting feeling of having something so soft cradling her hooves. "Hoo-ee, but this sure does feel good on mah poor dogs."

"I have to agree: this feels marvelous!" Rarity exclaimed. "Why in all of Equestria would pegasi ever want to come down from here?"

"To get food; you can't really grow much up here," Twilight spoke from ahead, missing the rhetorical aspect of the question entirely.

"Uh, yes… I suppose that _is_ a good reason," the white mare responded, letting out a tiresome and awkward laugh in an attempt to somewhat normalize the conversation.

The three traveled along the path until they came upon the lumbering door of the house, noticing how regal and majestic it all appeared to be. It seemed very out of character for Rainbow Dash, considering she was usually reckless, somewhat immature, and always about going fast and being the best athlete she could be. Her focus was never on architecture and fancy living, so it was a question that had been left unresolved as long as the other wonder of how Twilight learned to pilot hot air balloons.

The librarian raised a hoof and knocked on the door, surprised by how wooden it sounded considering it was made of cloud. The three waited for a response, but only silence followed. She tried again, this time louder.

Still nothing.

"Well now where could she be?" Applejack wondered aloud.

"Perhaps she stepped out for a minute or she had to run to the store?" Rarity suggested, each perfectly acceptable answers. "I mean, it _is_ only quarter after one, at the latest: not exactly an uncommon time to be out."

"Yeah, but Ah told her Ah'd be back later for the book. Ah'd think she'd stay here if she knew Ah was gonna be stoppin' by," Applejack stated.

"Either way, we can't just go in when she's not here. We'll have to wait outside until she gets back," Twilight responded.

"Or…" Applejack started before turning and pushing the door open, "We could go inside and say the door was already open when we got here."

"I don't know if that's the best way to go about this," Rarity objected.

"Well, the way Ah see it, it's payback fer all the times Rainbow has snuck into mah bedroom at night and pulled pranks on me; maybe it'd teach her a thing or two about privacy and respectin' boundaries."

Twilight and Rarity looked at each other and shrugged, seeing the point that she was making. The two then followed Applejack's lead and walked into the building. They seemed to enter into the living room, filled with a couch, a few armchairs, and a coffee table. It was not exactly a large room, but it could definitely accommodate several ponies at once. A kitchen was one room over, only being separated from the larger living room by a support column and a bar. There were not many things decorating the space—a couple Wonderbolts posters, a bookshelf, a mirror—but it oddly still felt comfortable to be in.

"I have to say, Rainbow has great taste in houses. The architecture is simply marvelous!" Rarity spoke, admiring the building for all it was worth.

"Yeah, it's great and all, but we need to find that book! Think like Rainbow Dash: where would she put something she's trying to keep a secret?" Twilight brainstormed.

"Honestly, it might not even be here if she's hidin' it; RD's awfully good at puttin' things in spots you'd never think to look," Applejack said.

"Let me guess: something you've picked up on from one of her pranks?" Rarity bemused, not entirely serious.

"Wha-! How'd ya know?!" the farm pony exclaimed in a genuine and surprised tone. Rarity rolled her eyes and chuckled before Twilight spoke up.

"Well, if she does have it someplace else, we can't figure out where that is until she gets back. I mean, we could still look around here, but I don't feel entirely comfortable with searching through my friend's house on my first visit."

"Yeah, Ah agree with that. Even though Dash has pranked the livin' daylights outta me, we shouldn't start goin' through her stuff," Applejack admitted. "Ah've gotta say, though, it's kinda weird that this is the first time Ah've been in RD's house and she ain't even here," Applejack commented.

"Well, we could've waited outside until she got back," Twilight remarked, "But regarding this being our first time in here, it makes sense considering the only one of us who can enter naturally is Fluttershy, but even she doesn't come here that often. I guess Rainbow just doesn't really want lots of visitors."

"Well, I don't mind having the company every once in awhile," a voice spoke from behind them. The three spun around to see the one and only Ms. Rainbow Dash and her trusty sidekick, Tank, sitting in the door frame. "But I'd prefer it if you'd let me know when you're going to drop by."

"Oh, like yer so keen on lettin' ponies know when yer gonna be around, like when you snuck into mah bedroom and left twenty bales of hay stacked around mah bed," Applejack teased, knowing exactly how hypocritical she was being.

"Oh, don't be so sore about it, AJ. It was a good prank and you know it!" she shot back with a smile plastered to her face in sweet remembrance: the farmer's reaction to waking up in her flavescent room was as priceless as one could get.

"Well, look, we can talk about that some other time. Ah came for the book."

"The book?" Rainbow asked, as if she did not hear her correctly.

"Yeah, the one Ah gave you earlier at mah farm."

"Ohh right, _that_ book." The mare laughed uneasily. "Well, funny you should mention that…"


	5. Pinkie Pie

_**Fifty Neighs of Gray: Pinkie Pie**_

"What in tarnation d'ya mean ya don't _have_ the book?!"

"I mean I don't have the book! But relax, 'cause I know exactly where it is."

"Rainbow, Ah asked ya to do one simple thing fer me and that's it. D'ya remember what that one thing was?"

A sigh. "Hold onto the book unti-"

"Hold onto the book until later! Well, it's later, so why don't ya have the book?!"

Rarity and Twilight sat on the floor as they observed the verbal tennis match that took place before them with astute attention; their heads moved from side to side, following the ball as the volley continued for several turns before being ended by a smashing move by Rainbow Dash.

"Will you just _shut up_ and _listen_ to me?!" she lashed out, the pegasus' temper getting the better of her as her shout crushed the arguing voice and nearly shook the whole house, leaving everything as eerily silent as she had noticed earlier. Applejack adjusted from her initial shock and took on a look that beckoned for an answer, waiting as she leaned against the end of the couch.

"Sorry, but you wouldn't let me explain," Rainbow said before continuing: "I had the book with me, but I had to run and get some advice on sex stuff for Tank, 'cause I don't know how tortoises do it."

"All right. So then where'd ya go?" the farmer questioned. Before she could answer, Twilight cut in.

"Wait. You didn't go to _Fluttershy_ , did you?!" she panicked. Rarity and Applejack gasped at her words as the thought of the timid pegasus picking up and reading the book struck them with fear as to how she might react.

"What? No," Dash said, wondering how that was even a consideration. "I went to Pinkie Pie. Why would I go to Fluttershy?"

"Uh, because she's the one in our group of friends who knows about and takes care of animals," she explained, "Why did you go to Pinkie Pie?"

" 'Cause she owns a reptile, duh," she answered. While the three wished they could pick on Rainbow for how silly that was, they had to admit it was not really all that bad of an idea.

"Okay, so you visited Pinkie Pie for turtle-"

"Tortoise," Dash interjected.

"Er- yes, _tortoise_ advice. So then where's the book?" Rarity questioned.

"Where d'ya think?" she asked rhetorically, "At Pinkie's place."

"Why'djya leave it there?" Applejack asked.

"It's not like I meant to. I brought it along to…" Dash trailed off as she tried to remember why she had brought the book with her in the first place, but she drew a blank, "I don't know, but I had it with me and I must've set it down while we talked. I doubt Pinkie even knows it's there."

Twilight grew ecstatic. "So you think there's a good chance she hasn't read it yet?!"

"Well, it's kinda hard to read something if ya don't know it's there," she picked. Twilight opened her mouth to defend her thinking, but closed it and kept silent due to a dry source of reasoning.

"Then what are we waiting for? Let's grab that book before it makes its way around to anypony else!" Rarity exclaimed as she jumped up from where she had been sitting.

"Awfully giddy to get your book back, huh Rarity?" Rainbow asked, causing the mare to stop and look at the pegasus.

"Oh, no, no, no, darling; it's not mine, it's-" She stopped herself before going any further, remembering what had happened the last time she blurted out the answer to that question. "Uhh…" she droned blankly, scanning the faces of her two other friends, which provided no support other than, "Don't say it's Twilight's!"

"It's mine," Rarity spoke, taking the blame for one friend while earning skepticism from another.

"But… you just said it _wasn't_ yours," Rainbow stated.

"Yes… but I, um, thought we were talking about a… different book?" Rarity explained, sounding just as confused as her friend.

"Are you sure about that?" she pressed.

Rarity merely began to nod slowly as she reviewed her answer before going quicker to confirm that as her choice.

"Uh huh… so then how do you get that mixed up with-"

"Oh, fer goodness sakes, it's Twilight's book. Now can we quit it with the twenty questions and get a move on?" Applejack announced, cutting off the pegasus and shattering the librarian's cool.

"Wha-, no! It's not mine! It was left at my library this morning!" she cried out, trying to justify herself in any way possible, but Rainbow had already moved on and was headed for the door as per the farmer's request.

"Okay, okay, geez. Why didn't you just say so?" she responded to Applejack, then addressing Twilight next: "It's not that big of a deal; so you get off to reading about dirty stuff ponies do, so what? I mean, I didn't expect it to be you, but still." Twilight had no idea how to react, so she was left where she stood with her mouth agape and face contorted into a look of shock and embarrassment. She stayed this way until the three others were at the door ready to leave.

Applejack stopped and called to her. "Are ya gonna stand there and gawk all day or are ya comin' to get yer book?"

Her mouth closed and bent into a frown at the statement, giving a huff and beginning her trudge to the balloon. She passed Rarity, who was holding the door for her in an attempt to console her friend, but Twilight did not make eye contact and proceeded past. Rarity had to feel sorry for the poor thing, especially since this was the second time her secret had gotten loose today, but she could not be more grateful that she was not responsible for it this time.

* * *

"The sun had already peaked and was now in the middle of its descent to the western horizon as the four ponies trekked across the sky, three of them in the basket of their hot air balloon and the fourth pulling it through the air by means of a rope secured around her waist. Their destination: Sugar Cube Corner, the popular bake shop that resided near the center of Ponyville. Their mission: take back the infamous novel Fifty Neighs of Gray before it is seen by anypony else. Can they get the book back? Is it too late and Pinkie Pie has already read it? Find out next time on the adventures of-"

"Twilight, what are ya doin'?" Applejack asked her friend.

"Narrating," she responded simply.

"Uh… why?"

"It's a thing I like to do when I'm passing the time. Usually I just do it in my head, but I figured you guys wouldn't mind," she said. "You should give it a try; you might like it!"

She thought, unsure of the activity. "Narratin', huh? Well, how do Ah do it?"

"Oh, it's simple, really. Just say what's going on around you."

"Uh, well… we're flyin' in a balloon. It's kinda windy up here. Ah don't like lookin' at the ground, 'cause it makes me feel dizzier than a raccoon on a roundabout. Twilight's lookin' at me a bit strange, like Ah've got food stuck in mah teeth or somethin'." The farm pony stopped her mediocre narrative style to run her tongue over her pearly whites, just to make sure she really did not have anything left over from her last meal before addressing her friend. "What? Am Ah not doin' it right?"

Twilight paused to plot out her words before speaking: "Well, you're definitely doing it, but it lacks… pizzazz, I guess is the word I'm looking for. It's not very interesting to listen to. Say it like you're telling a story or pretending to be an announcer." Applejack nodded slowly as she took in Twilight's constructive criticism.

"Announcer. Got it." She took a breath in and started over, taking on the accent of a suave radio personality from the city of Manehattan: "Hello and good evenin', fillies and gentlecolts, and welcome back to our weekly broadcast of Tail Tales! When we last left off, our four darin' heroes strode across the sky in their magic vehicle, hopin' to reach the Sweets Palace in the far-off land of Bakensell in an attempt to retrieve the mystical book of gray magic spells (which are like black magic spells, but with many varying degrees of power.) If their sources were correct, then slippin' in and snatchin' it should be a breeze, so long as the mischievous Pink Lord hadn't found it first."

Applejack stopped her make-believe broadcast to return to Twilight, only to find the unicorn just over a hair away from the end of her nose, completely agog.

"Uh, you okay? Did Ah do all right?"

"Well?" was all she said.

" 'Well' what?"

"Aren't you going to finish? What happens next?" she asked, actually snagged by the mare's improvised intro.

"Whatdya mean, 'What happens next?' We ain't even gotten to Pinkie Pie's yet."

Rarity, who had began listening in on the conversation during Applejack's first attempt, spoke up: "Darling, if I could ask, where did you learn to narrate like that?"

"Oh, it's just somethin' Ah've picked up on. Y'know those shows ya hear on the radio sometimes? Well, we all try to get our chores done ahead of time on Thursdays to tune in to one of the city stations that plays our favorite radio show. Ah guess that's just what Ah thought of when Twilight said announcer," she responded.

"Well, you certainly have a knack for it; a certain _je ne sais quoi_ that leaves ponies on the edges of their seats," she said, directing her gaze over to Twilight.

"Okay, so I probably shouldn't have gotten as caught up in her narration as I did, but you've got to admit, she's pretty good," Twilight said.

"A natural, if I do say so."

"Aw, shucks, you two. Ah'm nothin' special; just sayin' what's happenin'."

"Well, I can tell you what's gonna happen next in our little story," Rainbow called back from her spot ahead of the basket. "We're gonna reach Sugar Cube Corner and it's gonna be totally _packed_ with ponies."

The three in the basket moved to the edge to spy a swarm of ponies crowded around the entrance of the bakery, slowly moving in as others walked out with treats in tow; however, even as ponies entered and left, the mob was able to maintain its size as more ponies joined the mass from the streets.

"What the hay?" Twilight remarked. A crowd this size would surely interfere with their task, if not spoil their chances to get the book back altogether. She then turned to the pegasus. "Rainbow, why didn't you tell us about this earlier?"

"Hey, this is the first time I'm seeing this. The store was closed when I dropped by. All these ponies must've showed up after I left."

"Well, you didn't happen to have that talk with Pinkie in her bedroom, did you?" Twilight asked.

"Yeah, we did, but the first, like, fifteen minutes we were downstairs, 'cause she was getting things ready for work. Why?"

"Because if that's the case, then there's still a chance that you left the book downstairs, which means we need to get down there, fast. Somepony could see and take the book if they haven't already!" she exclaimed. Then, looking to the balloon controls above them, she stopped the flame altogether.

"Rainbow, head down there and get inside to find the book while we land. The sooner we can get that forsaken stack of bound pages away from the public, the better," Twilight ordered, taking charge of the situation so she could get her novel back. Rainbow nodded, filled with determination, and took off towards the crowd in a prismatic streak. Twilight then faced the two other ponies that remained with her. "As for us, we can't do anything until this balloon lands and we can get our hooves on the ground."

The two agreed with that plan, because while jumping was certainly an option and perhaps the quickest way down to the streets below, it certainly did not carry the result they all would have liked (which was getting there in one piece.) Once again, they peered over the edge of the basket to see the ponies below, steadily growing larger as they neared.

"So why d'ya figure there are so many ponies?" Applejack pondered aloud.

"Who knows? I mean, it's a Sunday, so you wouldn't think that many ponies would be out and about, but maybe they all just had nowhere to go?" Twilight said, providing a possibility, but it was rather unlikely.

"Well, they have to be here for something. I guess we'll find out when we get closer," Rarity spoke.

"Speaking of which, we're just about… there, we've landed." The contact the basket made with the ground was evidence enough to say they had touched down, but Twilight merely confirmed it as an experienced pilot before continuing. "Just give me a second to tie it down and we can head on over."

She hopped out, causing the basket to lift slightly off the ground from the loss of weight. She latched onto one of the ropes hanging out of the basket, allowing her to effortlessly guide it over to a nearby post, where she used her magic to tie it off in a secure knot. With a hoof on the edge of the container, she held the vehicle to the ground as her friends made their way out, reaching in to grab a couple more ropes to ensure the balloon would not take off without its occupants. Applejack took this time to scan over the mass of ponies they were about to approach.

"Ah'd have thought RD would've been back by now. Ah mean, where could she have put that darned book that she couldn't find it?"

Twilight finished the last binding and turned to face the crowd, starting to trot with her friends. "I don't know, but I'd rather she can't find it at first than have somepony else stumble across it and make off with it."

"Yeah, Ah suppose. Maybe Pinkie found it and she's holdin' onto it fer Dash."

"Or perhaps she's stuck in the crowd," Rarity said.

Twilight shot a confused look to her. "Stuck in the crowd? How? She can fly right over."

"I don't know, darling; I'm just saying what I see," she responded, raising a hoof to point at the rainbow-maned mare in question.

"Rainbow?" Twilight called out. The pony turned around to reveal it was, in fact, Rainbow Dash, only more frustrated than usual. "Rainbow, what are you doing?"

"I'm stuck waiting to get in!" she responded, her high levels of irritation showing in her voice.

"Why don't you fly past everypony?" she asked, hoping the question would yield a better answer this time around.

"Ya don't think I tried?" she sassed. "They won't let me through when I get to the door and some of the unicorns and other pegasi even pull me back, yelling at me for not waiting my turn for the sale."

"Is that what this is about? A _sale_?" Applejack retorted.

"Trust me, I'm just as confused as you are," she replied.

"Oh, for the love of…" Twilight muttered before sparking up her horn. It began to shine with its purple glow before growing brighter. This continued until she shot her head forward, a loud crack echoing out as a beam of magic erupted forth and connected with the crowd in a blinding flash. When the four had gained back their senses, they noticed it was significantly quieter now. Looking to the crowd, they saw no movement, as if they all had been frozen in time.

"There. That should take care of our entry issue," Twilight proclaimed. She then began to make her way through the crowd, weaving between the living statues. The three remaining ponies were left speechless, each of them taking notice of how powerful their friend was and adding yet another mental note to their list of reasons as to why one should never mess with Twilight Sparkle. They quickly broke from their trance and followed after her, catching up just as she had entered the building. The four walked in to find that the effects had reached everypony inside, including the Cakes and Pinkie Pie. The three bakers stood frozen behind the counter, each holding frantic looks on their faces.

"Oh, whoops. Looks like my spell got into here," she said, walking up to the workers and tapping them on the shoulders to elicit some sort of reaction, but they stood frozen, just as the rest did. Without further discussion, she charged up her horn and released another blast, this one smaller than the previous so it would only affect the three ponies behind the counter. They all sprang to life, continuing their frantic squabble to deal with customers.

"Pinkie, do something to let everypony know about this mix up! The extra business is great, but we can't handle this many custom...ers..." Mrs. Cake said, turning her attention to the frozen mob of ponies before her.

"What in the…?" Mr. Cake managed to get out, utter confusion taking hold of his thought process.

"Don't worry, everything's fine. I froze them with a spell so we could talk to you," Twilight announced, her words grabbing their attention from their current flustered state.

"Hi, Twilight!" Pinkie called out, "Hi Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash!" They all waved to her, but Twilight asked the obvious question before continuing on with Pinkie.

"What's going on here, anyway?" she said, waving a hoof to the static madness before them. Mrs. Cake stepped forward after looking to the two others she was with, deciding she would start.

"Well, first off, thanks for freezing all of them; it was starting to get a little too crazy," she spoke. "As for the crowd, everypony is here because they think we have a sale going on. We had posters printed out the other day for advertising and they were supposed to say we were having a sale tomorrow of buy two, get one free, but there was a mix up in the printing: the pony in charge must've read it wrong and thought we were saying everything was half-off (which I'd think would be awfully difficult to mix up, but it happened.)"

"Well, I suppose that's an honest mistake, but why did you put them up if they weren't right?" Rarity questioned.

"That'd be my fault," Mr. Cake admitted. "When we had gotten them in, I was too busy to look over the posters and double check everything, so I just gave the box to the pony we hired to post them up around town. I guess it's all a long line of small mistakes that added up."

"Boy, do we know whatchya mean," Applejack said, looking around to the three other ponies she was with. "All day we've each made little mistakes and it's lead to this big ol' chase around town."

"And so far I'm not seeing what we're looking for," Dash added after scanning the room for the item they were after.

"On that note, we need to talk to Pinkie," Twilight said, looking over to the pink mare.

Pinkie perked up as she heard her name, akin to how a dog would. "Sure thing, Twilight! Whaddya need?"

She was about to begin her questioning, but was distracted by the eyes of the Cakes. She decided to take a different course of action to avoid unnecessary casualties by being exposed to the book, which had already made a proper mess. "Actually, is there someplace we can talk that's a bit more… private?" she muttered, motioning towards the two ponies who were standing just a few feet away.

"Why? The frozen ponies can't hear us, can they?" she questioned. Pinkie was as clueless as ever.

"No, I'm not talking about them, I'm talking about- ugh, never mind. Can we please just go to your room or something?"

"Okie dokie lokie!" With that, she bounded her way up the stairs with the the four ponies in suit, leaving Mr. and Mrs. Cake to look to one another and shrug. Before too much time had passed, Twilight came back down the steps, stopping once she spotted the bakers.

"Oh, and that spell only lasts about three minutes, so those ponies will start back up soon. Figured you deserve a fair warning." With that, she trotted back upstairs, leaving the two to nervously anticipate the oncoming storm of customers.

In Pinkie's room, the three stood around her as Twilight walked through the open door and joined the group. None of them had said anything yet, wanting to wait for Twilight before they did anything.

"So whatdjya wanna tell me?" the party pony asked, her signature smile on display, as it usually was.

Rainbow was the one to speak up: "Pinkie, have you seen a book lying around?"

"One about something a little… out of the ordinary?" Twilight added.

"An unordinary book? Hmm… not that I've seen," she said, "Buuut I saw something that seemed kinda strange after Dash left earlier." Everypony seemed to lean in just a little, as if they would get the news quicker if they were closer to the source. "It's over here, by my bed."

They all walked over to the nightstand next to the pony's bed, spying a black covered book resting on top. Twilight was the first to notice, irritated by her friend and her seemingly-never-ending stream of nonsense.

"Pinkie, I thought you said you haven't seen a book," she griped. The pony looked to the unicorn, then followed her gaze to the book in question. She rolled her eyes.

"I'm not talking about the book, silly. I'm talking about this!" she declared, lifting up a small stick that was lying beside it. "Isn't it so weird?!"

Everypony watched the pink mare with befuddled expressions as she held the piece of wood, not sure how to react to the ridiculousness that had been presented. Her look of excitement never faded as she stood there, waiting for confirmation from her friends. Rarity attempted to start, but she could not think of what to say, leaving the room still quiet.

"Uh…" was the noise that came from Twilight. It grabbed Pinkie's attention, so she felt as if she should continue, deciding to ask the obvious: "What exactly is it?"

"A stick, silly! What else would it be?" The party pony giggled at how unobservant her friend could be sometimes.

"What's so special about it?" Rainbow asked.

"Well, isn't it obvious?" she questioned. She looked around at her friends and they still seemed to be just as confused as before. As much as Pinkie loved her friends, they sure were ditzy, so she went ahead and explained.

"Ya see, Gummy brought me this stick just after Dashie left, which isn't the weird part, 'cause he does that all the time. I actually keep a collection of all the ones he's brought me," she said, waving a hoof in the direction of a glass display against the wall, showcasing at least a dozen sticks. "The weird part is that this one is from a _pine_ tree, but all the other ones he's gotten were _maple_."

The group sat in silence, lost for words, except for one, who at this point had enough of the mare's shenanigans.

"Ah, forget this," Applejack said, reaching for the book that had been on the stand. She flipped it and looked over the cover, disappointment spreading across her face. "It ain't it."

There was a collective groan from the group, leaving Pinkie to wonder what in the world was going on. "Why do you guys want to find a weird book anyway?"

" 'Cause I brought one here with me when I came to talk about Tank, but I forgot it when I left," Rainbow said. "It's called Fifty Neighs of Gray."

"Ohh, _that_ book? Why didn't you just say so?" she said, snickering a little. Everypony looked around to each other, wondering why they had not asked that question to begin with.

"I suppose we figured you wouldn't have noticed Rainbow carrying a book with her when she stopped in," Rarity said. While that may not have been true (the correct reason being that the group simply over-thought their whole approach), it was the answer that was able to save them the most amount of face while still seeming plausible. Twilight, however, did not care at this moment if she came across as foolish.

"It doesn't matter. Do you have it?!" Twilight questioned, hope running high within her.

"Oh, no," she said, "But I know what you're talking about. I don't get why it's 'out of the ordinary,' though. Seemed fine to me when I read it. The ending kinda threw me for a loop, but overall it was pretty good."

"Wait, you _read it already_? But it's only been, like, a half hour. How did you read that thick thing so quickly, especially since you had to work?!" Rainbow exclaimed.

"I dunno," she responded, "I guess I'm just a fast reader and a good multitasker!" Everypony knew that Pinkie was a mare of many talents (some appearing to be more paranormal than others), but to read an entire full-length novel in under a half an hour was insane. This awe from the group was disrupted once again by Twilight.

"All wonder about Pinkie's skills aside, you didn't think the book was dirty? Like, inappropriate and sexual?" The pink pony snorted as she giggled and shook her head at the question.

"Nope! Why would I? I mean, it was about two ponies who hang out and wrestle in bed all day with cool, leather clothes. How is that anything like what you said?" The mare smiled for a second before her expression began to change. "Wait a minute… they weren't wrestling!" she shouted in her moment of realization. Everypony could not help but let out a chuckle as their friend connected the literary dots. Pinkie was, for the lack of a better word, a dork; albeit a high-energy and quirky dork, but a dork nonetheless. Rarity was the first to calm down from the rousing, so she naturally took the lead to continue progress towards their objective.

"Now darling, where's the book?" Rarity asked, looking around the room as if she would now miraculously spot it after the confusion was cleared up.

"I already said I don't have it," she responded. "I guess we kinda skipped over that part with the whole, 'Pinkie's got crazy reading skills' thing." This answer brought Twilight around quicker than the rest, instantly taking her out of her light-hearted mood and dropping her smack dab in the middle of a sour one.

"Ugh, of course you don't have it. That's all this ordeal has been: go get the book, but the book isn't there," Twilight snapped, feeling rather bitter. She did not know why, but she felt like a plumber: trudging around in filth and doing a bunch of dirty work, but when she would finally reach her goal, she is greeted by a small man that tells her she has to make her way to another castle in order to her princess.

"Well, ya can't forget about all the trouble and confusion it's caused, too," Applejack added, remembering how Rarity thought it had been Sweetie Belle's and how the farmer thought it was Rarity's.

"I have to say, this would make for a great story. I wonder how it will end," Rarity spoke, joking slightly, but Applejack knew how she had her strange beliefs from when the fashionista had told her about them in chapter fou- er, I mean, before they had left to go to Rainbow Dash's house in the hot air balloon.

"Hopefully we'll find out soon," Twilight responded. She then turned her attention towards Pinkie Pie. "So if you don't have the book, then where is it?"

"Well, I thought it was such a great story that I just _had_ to share it with somepony else. Luckily, the pony I thought would enjoy it stopped in today to get some treats, so I gave it to her when she left."

"Let me guess: you gave it to Fluttershy." The very words sent chills down the spines of the ponies in the room, causing some to even gasp. Rainbow then began laughing (probably too hard) at her joke before she died down and wiped away a tear. Of course she would take this opportunity to make a joke, no matter how serious of a topic it was. Her friends, however, still remained quiet. She was surprised that they did not find the ridiculousness of the idea enough to suggest that she was being facetious. She then realized Pinkie was not laughing either, rather holding an uneasy look with an awkward grin to match.

"You didn't…"

"Eh heh heh…" was all she responded with.

Everypony's eyes grew wide with horror as Twilight spoke for those in the room: "Oh, sweet Celestia…"


	6. Fluttershy

_**Fifty Neighs of Gray: Fluttershy**_

Dust flew from their hooves as the five ponies galloped at full speed down the road towards the Everfree forest, wanting to waste no time in their attempt to stop something absolutely terrible from happening. They were all panting and sweating from the physical exertion, aches and pains nearly crippling their bodies, but they had to push aside those feelings if they wanted to hold any chance of stopping their friend from ruining her psyche, effectively keeping her sheltered from the evils of their world.

In hindsight, perhaps it would have been wiser to have Rainbow Dash—who was considerably faster than the other four—fly ahead in order to reach the cottage of the meek pegasus sooner to stop her from reading the book, but that, unfortunately, was a possibility that had been overlooked by the group as a whole in the midst of high levels of stress.

In the distance, they could see the treetops of the forest as they came over the knoll to Fluttershy's house, the path becoming a coarser dirt filled with rocks compared to the nicer, finer, more-filtered earth found in town. The group could only hope that they were not too late and wonder what they would find when they arrived. Would Fluttershy be okay? What would they say if she had not already read the book, because she would most likely be curious? Sure, normally something like this would not cause such an ordeal, but this was Fluttershy, the most timid and innocent pony in Equestria; her friends had every right to be concerned with her well-being.

The cottage was now in sight and the group felt increasingly anxious as they neared, only slowing their pace after they had crossed the natural bridge that arched over the stream running in front of the house. The sun's position meant it was close to two o'clock, which left plenty of time for the mare to have read enough of the novel to be scarred if she had started right away. A hoof was raised to knock on the dutch door and all five ponies waited for a response after it did. They gasped for air, trying to regain composure before the pegasus opened the door; they certainly would not be able to help if they were all hunched over on her doormat, heaving as they breathed.

A few seconds had passed and there was no answer. The worst began racing through their minds: she had keeled over and died from shock. Perhaps, if they were lucky, she was just stunned and, with the right mental care and rehabilitation, she would make a full recovery and one day finally be back to being herself again. Either way, the group could not just wait outside while precious seconds ticked away, leaving less and less chance of rescuing their dear friend.

Without a word, Applejack stepped forward and faced her rear towards the door, looking to the rest of her friends. They nodded, giving her the all-clear to proceed. With skill and precision, the farmer rocked onto her forehooves and cocked her back legs into her body, then pulled the trigger and launched her signature bucking power through her haunches and out of her hooves, a loud crack sounding out as they made contact with the door. It flung open, the kick nearly taking it off of its hinges. What the group heard next was unexpected.

"OOF!" the voice cried out, followed by a thud, like somepony had dropped a sack of potatoes. Applejack turned to observe the carnage only to find a disoriented Fluttershy sitting on the wooden floor of her cottage. At the sight of her current state, her friends could only assume the obvious, which meant she read the book and had fainted at the first line of promiscuous dialogue! The pegasus' friends surrounded her, all attempting to bring her to.

"Fluttershy, are you okay?!" Twilight spoke. Meanwhile, Rarity had grabbed a newspaper that had been sitting nearby to fan the dazed creature. Applejack and Rainbow Dash moved around behind her to slowly and carefully raise her up into a sitting position, leaving Pinkie to look around frantically to see if there were a way she could help the situation.

"Fluttershy, say something, please!" Twilight continued to beckon. She began to gain a foothold in the world around her as she focused in on the voice.

"Ohh… my head…" she groaned, raising a hoof to hold against it.

"Oh no. It's too late! She's already read the book!" Rarity cried out, falling backwards in mock-faint while beginning to fan herself.

"Huh? Too late? What boo-"

"Clear!" came Pinkie's voice, turning the attention to her and her bucket of water she had found out of desperation to bring Fluttershy back to the land of the living. The liquid crashed down on everypony crowded around the poor pegasus, drenching them all to the bone.

If Fluttershy was not already in shock, she was now, along with four of her other friends that were next to her. They all yelled out in surprise as they had been soaked by the preemptive pony, the last bit of water dripping out of the bucket and to the floor.

"What the heck, Pinkie?!" Rainbow shouted, summing up the thoughts of the rest of her friends.

"I-I'm sorry! I panicked! I didn't know what to do…" she said, attempting to hide her face behind the bucket. Before anything else could be said, they were all interrupted.

"What in Equestria is going on?!" It came from the middle of the group: a soft, but irritated voice. It was Fluttershy, now aware of her surroundings and working at full mental capacity.

"Fluttershy, you're okay!" Twilight exclaimed, pulling the pegasus into a hug.

"I guess so. I mean, I don't exactly feel good after you hit me with the do-"

"We know and we're sorry. Of course you're not going to feel your best after reading something as awful as that," Twilight butted in.

"Wait, ' _reading?_ ' What are you talking abou-"

"What's important is that you're okay and you don't ever have to worry about that nasty novel again."

"Twilight, I really don't understa-"

"We're actually quite surprised you're as well as you are, darling, especially considering what happened to you."

"Rarity, I don't think we're talking about the same thi-"

"Ah guess we underestimated yer willpower, huh, Fluttershy?"

" _STOP_!" The shout halted them all in their tracks, as any famous-yet-rare, patented "Fluttershy Yell®" would. The group did not dare say a word out of place following such a display. After regaining some composure (enough to keep herself from shouting), Fluttershy continued: "I don't know what you all think is going on, but I don't see how it could warrant kicking my door in, throwing me to the ground, drenching me in water, and not letting me talk."

"Throwing you to the ground? We didn't throw you to the ground," Rainbow responded.

"Then why do you think I was on the floor when you came in?"

"Uh, 'cause you read a book and it was too much for you to handle, duh," Pinkie said, almost mockingly. "I mean, what else could it have been from? Hitting you with your door when Applejack burst in like the Royal Guard with a battering ram?" She laughed at the thought, once again surprised by how her friends could be so oblivious.

"Actually, yes. That door really hurt." She reached up and touched the bump on her head. "That's going to be swollen for at least a couple days…"

"Geez, Shy. Did Ah really hit ya with the door?" The look Fluttershy flashed gave more than enough evidence to say that is exactly what had happened, leaving the farmer feeling just plain awful. "Ah'm sorry, sugarcube. We all just wanted to make sure you were safe. When ya didn't come to the door right away, we got scared."

"I was in the kitchen making lunch. You didn't wait for more than ten seconds," she said, shooting down the reasoning for the accident and leaving no survivors. "And why were you so worried? What did you think had happened?" The group looked around to each other before settling on Twilight to be their main spokesperson, which was fine, since she had played the part so well for most of this adventure.

"Well, like Pinkie said, we thought you had read a book containing… questionable material and you couldn't mentally manage it," she responded. Fluttershy took immediate interest.

"Oh my! What was the book about? Dangerous magic? A scary monster? Demonic words of power from the Underworld sent here by the will of the Baphomet?" she asked, concerned with the power of this book if it had the ability to ruin her mind by simply reading it.

"Wait, what was that last one?" Twilight asked, but her question was overlooked as Rainbow Dash spoke up.

"Trust us, it's better if you don't know. Heck, I wish _I_ didn't even know." While Fluttershy would accept this answer, her face continued to hold a curious expression.

"Okay, but I still don't understand why you all think I have this book."

"We don't think you have it, we know you do: it's the book Pinkie Pie gave you," Rarity replied.

Her brows furrowed over her turquoise eyes. "The book Pinkie gave me? What do you mean?"

"Oh, for the love of Luna, you don't have it?!" Twilight exclaimed. "I swear, all I have done today is chase that damned book around town and I didn't even want to! Today was my day off and I was looking forward to just relaxing, but _somepony_ , whoever they may be, had to drop off that stupid novel at the library. Next thing I know, it's gone to Rarity, to Sweetie Belle, then Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, here, but it's not here! Of course, why would it be? It's just a never-ending trail of trying to get this thing!"

She huffed and puffed, frustration boiling over, but she then began to calm down, setting everypony else at ease. Once she realized the rest had been staring at her through her whole rant, a sheepish grin made its way onto her face.

"Sorry about that. I was just really hoping I could finally nab this book here and finish it all."

"Well, you're in luck," Fluttershy said.

"And why's that?" she responded, hope exiting her body, leaving her feeling empty.

"Because you didn't let me finish." The pegasus got up and walked into the kitchen, only to return seconds later with a black book, the words "Fifty Neighs of Gray" written in gold print on the cover. The group let out a collective gasp, knowing their search had finally come to an end.

"But… I thought you didn't have the book; the way you responded when we said Pinkie gave it to you…" Twilight spoke, a small amount of awe in her voice.

"I didn't get what you were saying because I didn't understand what was so bad about this book. The way you were talking made it seem like it was something horrible."

Her words sat in the air for a second as they worked their way into the group's ears. They had heard what she said, but they did not really _hear_ her. Seconds after the words were initially spoken, the statement clicked in the minds of everypony in the room.

"Wait." The voice came from Rainbow. "You _read_ the book?!"

"Well, not all of it. I only got to the part where they get up from bed the next morning." Rainbow, Rarity, and Applejack (not having read the book themselves) looked to either Twilight or Pinkie to gauge how to react. Pinkie, whom originally found nothing wrong with the book, still provided no help at this point in time; however, Twilight's mouth hung agape with a mix of shock and horror spread across her countenance, letting the rest know that Fluttershy was far past the point of no return.

"But you're okay!" Rarity continued as she turned back around from making observations of Twilight's face.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" Fluttershy asked, totally puzzled by what her friends were saying.

"Quick! How many hooves am I holding up?!" Pinkie shouted, two forelegs shooting up in front of her.

Applejack swatted her. "Knock it off, Pinkie. This is serious!" she scolded.

"I'm very confused…" was all the poor mare had to say before lowering her head in thought. The group died down, realizing they were not making things any better by reacting the way they were. Twilight took the lead once again in an attempt to comfort her friend.

"Fluttershy, you realize what that book is about, right?" she asked tenderly, almost as a concerned mother would.

"Well it's kind of hard to miss. I mean, they sure aren't wrestling," she joked.

"Well it's not _that_ hard to imagine…" Pinkie muttered, earning a chuckle from Applejack, who was sitting beside her.

"But it's something that's so… _uncouth_ to be reading about. (At least according to other's standards,)" Rarity said.

"I understand that fornication isn't normally something you talk about in public, or even really in private, but it _is_ only natural. All animals do it, including ponies," she responded calmly.

"Yeah, but what's going on in that book isn't just normal sex. It's got harnesses and toys and-"

"Fetishes are only natural, too," she said. Jaws were close to dropping at the fact that Fluttershy knew what fetishes were, but everypony in the room managed to keep them shut. She could pick up on what the others were thinking and gave a slight chuckle. "I know it doesn't seem it, but I'm not as innocent as you all think. Just because I don't talk about something doesn't mean I don't know what it is."

The group still remained silent, trying to process and interpret what she had said. With a soft smile, she turned and walked to the kitchen. "I have plenty of groceries to make us all lunch if you'd like to stay." She disappeared as she passed through the cased opening, leaving her friends gawking at each other in a circle.

After a few more seconds of astonishment, they all slowly absorbed what had been presented to them and came to terms with the fact that Fluttershy was an adult mare who could handle reading about sex in an erotic novel; it was nothing more and nothing less of that. They then realized that they were all quite hungry, most of them missing out on lunch due to this book hunt. One after the other, the group rose and made their way into the kitchen to help fix up some food, each being reminded of Pinkie's "rescue attempt" as their fur sloshed quietly as they moved and they felt the spare droplets of water falling from their bellies.

"Boy, Ah bet yer 'author in the sky' would love this story, huh Rarity?" Applejack spoke, making sure to remain quiet enough so the others would not overhear their conversation.

"I'm sure he would. That's why he wrote it and had us perform it! Almost like a little play. I have to say, I thought I acted wonderfully, don't you think?"

The farmer chuckled and shook her head. "Well, Ah suppose you _would_ play the role of yerself pretty well," she stated, earning a giggle from her friend. She decided to humor her a little. "How 'bout me? How d'ya think Ah did?"

"Oh, absolutely splendid, darling! _Magnifique!_ " she praised. The two shared a soft smile—the kind that strengthens a friendship—and continued to help with preparing lunch, enjoying this sudden and unexpected opportunity to be with friends.

And to think that this all was because of a simple (yet notorious) piece of erotica, which gave this group of friends a story full of mystery, suspense, and humor that they could share for years to come.

* * *

 **Be sure to stay tuned for the short epilogue chapter (coming next week at its regular posting time) in which we will have a short view of the aftermath caused by this fracas, and, most importantly, find out who the mystery pony is that dropped the book off at the Golden Oak Library in the first place! If you'd like, leave a comment stating who you think it is and you can see if you're right and also find out what others' predictions are! Hope to see you there!**

 **-PSG**


	7. The Mystery Pony

_**Fifty Neighs of Gray: The Mystery Pony**_

A few days had passed after that frantic day of book chasing and utter confusion, but things had returned to normal, as they always would have. The events of that day were still fresh in the minds of the six ponies involved and they still laughed at the insanity that ensued because of one silly book. Each of their unique stories had been told over lunch after the ordeal had been resolved: how Rarity thought Sweetie Belle got the book from somewhere and blamed herself for her nonexistent habits, how Applejack thought Rarity left it out and Sweetie Belle accidentally brought it with her (and also how she got wrangled into quilting for the first time), all the way to what Fluttershy thought of the little bit she had read of the book.

However, no matter how many times they each recounted the story from their unique perspectives, they could not figure out the most prevalent, most important mystery of all: who dropped the book off at the library in the first place? Twilight's memory of the shadow she saw was still fresh, but there was nothing of use she could pull from what she saw: a silhouette of a pony running away before rounding a corner and disappearing from view. No colors, no cutie mark, no gender. The only thing they could assume was that they were not a pegasus, because why would a pegasus run on the ground when they could fly and get away much quicker?

They all settled with the fact that they would never find out and it would be best for them to forget about trying to solve the classic mystery case of "who done it?"

Twilight continued to read and eventually finish the novel (enjoying every word of it) and set up times to spend with Rarity to talk about their favorite erotica. Rarity began exporting her old books to Twilight while making sure to be the best role model possible for her little sister. Rainbow Dash, now better educated in reptile reproduction, taught Tank and helped him become a safer tortoise (even if he was not sexually active in the first place.) Fluttershy was completely fine and eventually ended up reading the book after Twilight, just to prove to the others that she could handle it, and, although it might not have been to the same extent as Twilight, she did enjoy the writing and plot of the story. Pinkie Pie was totally unaffected by the whole ordeal, since she had the least amount of contact with the book (despite reading the entire thing); however, she was now aware of what ponies had been doing all this time when she would accidentally walk in on their "secret wrestling matches." The Cakes managed to fight off the storm of peeved customers, but they decided to take the next two days off to get some much-needed and well-earned R&R.

Applejack was also mostly unaffected by the chaotic impact of the book, but she began taking part in more of the Crusaders' cutie-mark-gaining attempts, bringing her closer to both her younger sister and her friends. The farmer's family certainly found the whole story about the novel funny, sans Apple Bloom due to her age, but one pony in particular seemed a little off about it. She could not put her hoof on what it was, but he almost seemed uneasy when she had first told them about the book…

* * *

It was dark in the loft of the barn, hay bales scattered about and spare tools that had been tossed up there to be kept out of the way sat around. As the lantern cast its light onto the dark surfaces, its luminescents ebbed and flowed with the flickering flame, all in time to its moving container. The stallion was careful not to drop it, wanting to keep his family's barn from burning to the ground because of an accident. He set down the light source and moved to a loose board in the floor, raising it up to reveal a hidden compartment. Inside were books, at least five, each of varying size and colors, but they all had one thing in common.

"Applejack was close to findin' me out… too close," a deep voice came, "But these are worth it." He reached in and grabbed at a book with a black cover, gold print on the front reading "Fifty Neighs Darker."

"Ah knew it was risky leavin' that book at Twilight's, but what else was Ah supposed to do? Ah can't keep hoardin' these things, 'cause Ah'll run outta space," he reasoned, "And Ah couldn't bare just tossin' it into the woods or somethin'; it's too good for that."

Slowly, he worked his way over to a secluded part of the upper story: a crawl space behind some bales of hay that were stacked to keep light from getting out and possibly being seen from outside. It also doubled as a hiding spot for if somepony were to venture up there unexpectedly.

"It was even more risky stoppin' at the library in the daylight, but because of how Applejack was on mah case about runnin' errands that morning and seein' as how Ah'd just finished the book, Ah figured it'd be early enough that nopony would see me do it." He gave a sigh before continuing his monologue. "Ah was _not_ , however, expectin' the darned thing to be so loud when Ah dropped it in. Made me wish Ah'd waited 'til later that night to do it."

He thought for a moment, going back over everything he had been told had happened, wondering if all of the stress and worry that took place was all his fault. He shook his head. "No. Ah did the right thing. Besides, everythin' turned out fine. Nopony got hurt."

The stallion flipped open the novel to the spot he had marked, the top corner of the page folded over at the beginning of chapter three.

"Now, where did Ah leave off…?"

* * *

 **It's Big Mac for those of you who had any doubt. :P**

 **So that's it: Fifty Neighs of Gray is finished. There are no other chapters to wait for. I do have another story idea in the works, but I've yet to even come close to starting to write it, so it'll be a good while before the next story is out. It's another great idea, if I do say so.**

 **I know that one of the things I absolutely hate about reading stories is that empty feeling you get when you're done. You've finished this thing that you've invested your time and emotions into, but now it's over and there is nothing left and no more to come. It sucks, period. Sometimes it would take me days to get over it, depending on the quality of the story and how long it was. That's why I'm writing this little after-story monologue. It's to kinda ease you down and away from the story and help you feel a little more resolved (for those who suffer from the same issue as me.)**

 **So what did you think? Good story? Anything you would've done differently? Did the characters seem to stay true to who they are in the show?**

 **I know I spent a lot of time making sure these chapters were how I wanted them to be (a process of which contained typing the chapter; reading it when it was done; having a close friend and fellow writer read them over; going through each to make sure punctuation and grammar were correct; conducting research on whether or not something was written correctly; reading through every single chapter [yet again] after all of the chapters were completed; going through and bolding, italicizing, and putting in page breaks in their appropriate places in the FanFiction document editor; and then finally posting each on time, all the while making changes and rereading them to make sure I liked them.)**

 **If you couldn't tell, I take my writing seriously. While I know I'm not perfect nor the best writer out there, I take pride in my work, because I know I'm much better than when I first started and I wouldn't be where I am today if I hadn't stuck with it.**

 **Listen to me, I'm talking about an MLP fanfiction like I did something important and worthwhile in** **my life. But that's the thing: this is just practice; it may be silly fanfictions now, but one day I may be writing best-sellers across the world. You never know. I believe that as long as you're improving in your craft, you are doing everything right.**

 **There, how's a motivational pep talk for a way to transition back into the real world? I hope you enjoyed it! Same goes for my story. Like I said, I've put a lot of work into it and it's all in the hopes of people enjoying what I produce. So with all of that being said, I'm gonna go ahead and head on out. Please feel free to leave a review stating what you liked, what you didn't care for, what you think I could've done better, what doesn't make sense, anything! Or, if you're feeling really courageous, shoot me a PM if you have any questions or would just like to talk and I'll get right back to you. I love talking to new people!**

 **All right, that's all. So until next time, have fun writing/reading/doing whatever,**

 **-PSG**


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